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Bar Chat

07/01/2013

Killer Tight End

San Francisco Giants Quiz: 1) Name the six to hit 200 home runs in a Giants uniform. 2) Name the only Giant to drive in 135 in a season three times. Answers below.

Aaron Hernandez and the Pats

New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez was charged with murder and five gun-related offenses in the death of one-time friend Odin Lloyd. Hernandez was apparently upset Lloyd was talking to the wrong people when the two were at a nightclub two night earlier.

Hernandez is believed to be the third NFL player charged with murder while active. Not sure if that includes Cleveland Browns rookie linebacker Ausar Walcott, who was charged the same day with attempted murder after he reportedly punched a man in Passaic, N.J. The Browns released Walcott on Wednesday.

Lloyd appeared to understand he was about to meet his end, June 17, when he was picked up by Hernandez and two associates. Lloyd texted his sister to alert her while he was in the car with the three. When she asked whom he was with, Lloyd answered, “NFL...just so you know.”

Lloyd was shot five times, with the final two fired by someone standing directly above him.

Hernandez, prosecutors said, felt betrayed. Lloyd had talked to some people Hernandez “had troubles with” when the men were out together on June 14.

Separately, Hernandez is now being investigated as a possible gunman in a double homicide in Boston in 2012, outside a nightclub where Hernandez had been.

According to the Boston Globe, Patriots team officials were shocked when Hernandez was charged with murder and not obstruction of justice, though the team was ready to release him no matter what the charges were.

NFL Players Association records show that the Patriots have voided all of Hernandez’ remaining guaranteed money, which is $5.91 million. The hits on the Patriots salary cap will start at $2.55 million in 2013, then escalate until Hernandez’ five-year contract leaves the books in 2015.

He had signed a $39.768 million extension in August 2012, with $16 million guaranteed, that included a $12.5 million signing bonus, prorated over five years. Hernandez has reportedly collected roughly $10 million thus far.

The Pats believe an umbrella clause that allows a team to suspend a contract for “conduct detrimental to the best interests of professional football” will keep Hernandez from collecting any more money from the team.

“Once, a long time ago, it was a wide receiver named Rae Carruth, of the Carolina Panthers, charged with being a part of a conspiracy to murder the woman pregnant with his child. We will begin to find out now if Hernandez is no better than Carruth, if he was the football player planning an assassination this time.

“Jovan Belcher of the Chiefs – another football player with his own stupid arsenal of weapons, legal weapons with him – shot and killed the mother of his child last year before killing himself at the Chiefs’ training facility. Belcher had no help, as Hernandez allegedly did, he did his shooting himself before the gun went to his own head. Hernandez? He doesn’t seem to have been particularly tortured after the fact, he was allegedly more interested in some clumsy dumb-jock cover-up, starting with having his house cleaned....

“So who is Aaron Hernandez of the Patriots, really?

“Clearly there have been others to come out of pro football accused of being murderers, with guns and knives and sometimes being drunk behind the wheel of a car. But maybe there has never been somebody like this guy, especially if it turns out that he killed before....

“When one of Hernandez’ lawyers tried to get his client out on bail, he talked about how Aaron Hernandez, out of Bristol, Conn., and the University of Florida, a player working on a $40 million contract, had no criminal history.

“Only that may turn out to be one more lie about No. 81 of the Patriots, who it turns out had all the guns he wanted because, well, who doesn’t these days?....

“Maybe he was just another gun guy in America with a cockeyed version of his Second Amendment rights, one who went looking for guns as soon as he became upset about ‘certain things’ that had happened with Odin Lloyd one night at a Boston club called Rumor.

“Until the ‘thing’ that happened to Odin Lloyd was that he got shot multiple times before his body got dumped in an industrial park not so far from where Hernandez lives with his girlfriend and daughter. This is the violence for which Hernandez, out of a violent sport, is charged, that has him in custody, that had him refused bail; the beginning of a search for justice for Odin Lloyd.

“This weekend, in the shadow of Hernandez’ arrest, the weekend of Odin Lloyd’s funeral, Joe Lefeged of the Colts is found to have his $900 unregistered semi-automatic weapon in a car stopped by the police in Washington, D.C. Nobody learns.

“So it is time for Roger Goodell to send a message about guns that gets through to some of the slow learners in his league. How about from now on if you are an NFL player and you are found to be in possession of an unregistered weapon, you get suspended for eight games, twice what you get for a dope offense, just for being a dope?

“Think about it: Who’s more dangerous, a football player using performance-enhancing drugs, or one who’s armed and dangerous, whether that means as dangerous as Aaron Hernandez or not?”

“The famed Patriot Way is a pile of rubble now, the final blows applied this week by each mind-boggling allegation against Aaron Hernandez that came tumbling out.

“While it would be foolish to count out Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, especially in a division as consistently weak as the AFC East, the obstacles now standing in the way of New England’s dynamic duo have never been this daunting – and Brady, who turns 36 in August, isn’t getting any younger.

“Consider this: Thanks to the loss of Hernandez and the potential unavailability of fellow Pro Bowl tight end Rob Gronkowski due to recent back and arm surgeries, Brady could go into Buffalo in Week I without his top five receivers from last season.

“Hernandez, Gronkowski, Wes Welker (now with the Broncos), Brandon Lloyd (released in March) and Danny Woodhead (now with the Chargers) accounted for a whopping 58 percent of the Patriots’ receptions in 2012, as well as 56 percent of the receiving yards, 53 percent of catches covering 20-plus yards and 38 percent of the touchdown receptions....

“It’s still labeled a dynasty in a lot of corners, but that label is now long in the tooth in Foxborough. Not only was New England’s last Super Bowl win during the 2004 season, but Belichick’s team is just 8-7 in the playoffs since then – including an unsightly three postseason losses at home, all in the past four years.

“Even more outdated is Belichick’s reputation as a defensive genius. Despite a lineup of high choices hand-picked by their control-freak head coach, Belichick’s defenses ranked a dismal 25th, 31st and 25th in the NFL in total yards the past three seasons.”

Ball Bits

--I know some of you not from the New York area wonder why I and others write so much about Alex Rodriguez, but how can you not? He is the gift that keeps on giving, even when he isn’t on the field.

I mean, who doesn’t want to see how this guy does if he ever returns? One day that seems likely, the next it doesn’t. The Yankees obviously don’t want him back, but at the same time, if they are to make a run for the playoffs they clearly need an A-Rod at even 50% versus the current stiffs they trot out.

So the latest, Saturday, had A-Rod saying that while he doesn’t know when he will start a minor league rehab assignment, he “can’t wait to get back.”

And now Yankee president Randy Levine is saying, “We need Alex back...we are desperate for his right-handed power, and he’s better than any third baseman on this team right now.”

Derek Jeter, also rehabbing, said he’s convinced A-Rod will be fine when he returns. [Jeter, by the way, “ran four times from first to third and four times from third to first on the grass just behind the infield dirt”!!! Yup, they cover everything in New York.]

Yes, the Yanks do need help, lots of it. They are 42-38, as I go to post prior to Sunday night’s contest in Baltimore. And while every team complains about injuries, no one has lost more stars than the Yankees...and it’s really not even close. Jeter, A-Rod, Teixeira, Granderson, Kevin Youkilis...that’s a lot of production...catcher Francisco Cervelli (who sucks but he was nonetheless the starter behind the plate), too.

As to the issue of A-Rod’s contract, there was conflicting talk this week that A-Rod would play a few rehab games and then claim he can’t play, retire from injury and then collect the balance of his contract. He would do this because he’s scared of Commissioner Bud Selig suspending him for his role in the Biogenesis case, at which point he could lose everything...at least the potential for that would be there.

“So, for example, Rodriguez did not address the theory the Yankees do not want him to return to the field because they would receive 80% of his $28 million 2013 contract – about $22.4 million – if he were to not play this year.

“But sources say that is incorrect. The way the Yankees’ policy works is they only get 80% if Rodriguez retires because of an injury and never plays again. For this season, the insurance is for roughly $7 million to $9 million, and they get a piece of that for any games missed this year because of his hip ailment.

“Thus, it hardly makes sense for a multi-billion-dollar corporation to try to slow Rodriguez down from returning. In fact, it could be argued the Yankees want to get Rodriguez on the field as quickly as possible so he can break down, never play again and they could recoup 80% of what remains on his deal, which at this moment is roughly $100 million for the next 4 ½ seasons.”

“Alex Rodriguez has 114 million reasons for telling the world that he has the green light to play baseball games again.

“According to sources close to the ongoing drama...Rodriguez and his advisers are so concerned that Major League Baseball’s drug posse is quickly closing in on him that they have ratcheted up the timetable for him to return to game action.

“Once he’s back playing in rehab games, the sources say, he could then claim he is physically unable to perform because of the serious hip injury he is recovering from, ‘retire’ from the game, and still collect the full amount of his salary - $114 million over the next five years....

“One way to do that is for Rodriguez to return to game action, find he can no longer perform up to his standards, then retire before he’s hit with a suspension without pay. A player who retires because he is physically unable to perform, even if he’s later suspended, would still get the full amount of his contract....

“(Today), a player who is deemed physically unable to perform is allowed by baseball to retire and still collect his money.”

--Yes, Pirates fans need not worry about finishing .500 this season. Hell, they are the best team in baseball right now, 51-30! And Andrew McCutchen, their best player, hasn’t been playing his best ball yet, either.

--Detroit hurler Max Scherzer is now 12-0, the best start since Roger Clemens opened 14-0 in 1986.

--Meanwhile, Scherzer’s teammate, Miguel Cabrera, is hitting .373 with 25 HR and 82 RBI thru 80 games.

But Baltimore’s Chris Davis has 30 home runs (79 ribbies) prior to Sunday night and he stands in the way of another Triple Crown for Miguel.

I was watching some of Saturday night’s Orioles-Yankees game on Fox and Tim McCarver was talking about Davis, saying how the totals of Bonds, McGwire and Sosa were tainted, as he was correct in doing so, as part of a conversation about Roger Maris and his 61.

All good...but then McCarver should have said what we all should be saying with regards to Davis or any other in his league.

Chris Davis has the chance to become the American League single-season home run record holder. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s quite good, frankly.

--Colorado’s Michael Cuddyer extended his hitting streak to 27 on Sunday.

--Friday night, the Mets’ Matt Harvey pitched 7 innings of one-run ball against the Nationals, striking out 11, walking none, and lowering his ERA to an even 2.00. He left the game leading 4-1 but the Mets’ bullpen blew it and New York lost 6-4, Harvey remaining at 7-1 with nine no decisions.

But the superstar (or supernova) has already thrown 117 innings in the first half of the season and Manager Terry Collins speculated over the weekend the team will shut him down at 200.

“We are not, we are not going to hinder this kid’s health by killing him now,” said Collins.

This is one instance where I’m not going to complain as a fan, should it work out this way. It’s not like the Metsies are going anywhere the rest of the season. They blow. 

They also are playing awful at home and haven’t scored more than five runs in 29 straight games at Citi Field.

So in terms of turning out the fans, it doesn’t help when you lose 13-2 at home as they did on Sunday to the Nats.

--Dodgers right-hander Josh Beckett will undergo season-ending surgery to relieve pressure on the nerve in his neck area, commonly known as thoracic outlet syndrome.

Yup, just another great contract. The 33-year-old is making $15.75 million this season and is due to make the same amount next year. In eight starts he is 0-5 with a 5.19 ERA.

--Reader Chuck E. first alerted me to the story that former Phillie Darren Daulton has been diagnosed with two brain tumors and will undergo surgery this week. Daulton, who has been hosting a baseball show on local radio the last four years, reported not feeling well the past two weeks and saw a doctor who made the discovery.

But as Chuck points out, other Phillies who played at the Vet, and are now dead of brain tumors, were Johnny Oates, Ken Brett, Tug McGraw and John Vukovich.

Yikes. Chuck, please pass on anything further on your line of thinking as it becomes available.

--Nice piece in the New York Times by Hillel Kuttler on Gettysburg’s own Eddie Plank, who won 326 games, 13th on the career list and 3rd among left-handers, after Warren Spahn and Steve Carlton. He died in town, 1926, and is buried there. My two trips to Gettysburg the last 20 years or so I forgot to look him up but I’ll do so sometime this fall, and will hold off on further comment until then. [No way was I dealing with the crowds this summer at the place, especially this week.]

The NBA Draft...and the Nets’ Big Move

--Yes, this was the worst NBA draft in memory, but it still provided some fascinating moments, leading off with Cleveland’s selection of power forward Anthony Bennett out of UNLV to be the number one overall pick, not Kentucky’s Nerlens Noel, who mysteriously dropped to sixth (and was then traded to Philadelphia).

Portland selected Lehigh’s C.J. McCollum with the tenth pick of the first round. A ton of people in this area, including my friends who are Lehigh alums, were praying Philadelphia would get him with the 11th pick, but, alas, Philly ended up with Michael Carter-Williams, PG, Syracuse, after McCollum was selected.

Maryland’s Alex Len, and Pittsburgh’s Steven Adams, were two seven-footers who went far higher than anyone could have guessed, especially back in January.

But Len, No. 5 by Phoenix, and Adams, No. 12 by Oklahoma City, have tremendous potential despite their meager college output. It’s players like these two that may have some rethinking in 3 or 4 years just how poor the 2013 draft really was.

Who would have thought back in January that New Mexico’s Tony Snell would be selected No. 20 by Chicago. He sure rocketed up the board, but I like the pick.

I think Brooklyn did well by going with Duke’s Mason Plumlee with the 22nd selection. He’s a tremendous athlete and should have a long, productive career. [Johnny Mac disagrees...we might have to place a barbecue bet on it.]

I was initially unexcited by the Knicks’ selection of Michigan’s Tim Hardaway Jr. with the 24th pick, but, upon further reflection, what the hell. Could be exciting off the bench.

Houston’s selection of Murray State guard Isaiah Canaan with the 34th pick was tremendous.

Portland made a good choice in taking Kansas center Jeff Withey, especially at No. 39. I just think this guy is going to be a lot better than most ‘experts’ say he will be.

Atlanta selected Bucknell F/C Mike Muscala at No. 44. Interesting. He could be a huge surprise, or a total bust. I’ll go with bust...though it’s really not fair to call any second-rounder a bust.

I absolutely love the Celtics’ selection of center Colton Iverson, Colorado State, with the 53rd pick (via Indiana). This guy could easily be one of the true sleepers of the draft. I got to see him a few times this year and he’s a big banger. He will be a definite favorite of Celtics fans.

[At No. 13, the Celtics chose Gonzaga’s Kelly Olynyk. I kind of soured on him end of the year. He seems to be too much into gardening and stuff.]

But of course I was shocked, SHOCKED, that San Diego State’s Jamaal Franklin fell all the way to No. 41, eventually grabbed by Memphis. [ESPN.com’s Chad Ford said he was “stunned” Franklin fell into the Grizzlies’ lap.] Some say he plays like a power forward but has the body of a shooting guard, only he can’t shoot.

All I know is that Jamaal Franklin is going to be a star in the league, and he just may show everyone how great he can be in next spring’s playoffs, in similar fashion to the way his former teammate, Kawhi Leonard, showed the world in the NBA Finals this year.

--I don’t recall ever wishing for the start of a new NBA season this early as I do today. It’s all because of the move the Brooklyn Nets made, the monumental trade that is bringing Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce and Jason Terry of the Celtics to Brooklyn in exchange for Kris Humphries’ expiring contract, Gerald Wallace, Kris Joseph, MarShon Brooks and a sign-and-traded Keith Bogans. In 2014, Boston also gets either Brooklyn’s or Atlanta’s first-round pick, whichever is worse, and in 2017, Boston has the right to swap picks with Brooklyn.

Some of the details are still a bit sketchy, like the draft situation (it’s not official until July 10) but this is one helluva blockbuster. It’s win now for the Nets and Russian owner Mikhail Prokhorov.

Yes, Garnett (37), Pierce (36 on opening night) and Terry (36 by then) are old, but if new coach Jason Kidd can squeeze two years out of them, particularly Garnett, boy, it’s going to be fun in these parts, especially as it further heats up the budding rivalry with the New York Knicks...Garnett and Carmelo Anthony literally hating each other.

Look at the Nets’ starting five:

PG: Deron Williams
SG: Joe Johnson
F: Paul Pierce
F: Kevin Garnett
C: Brook Lopez

The knock on the Nets last season was that they lacked toughness. Garnett and Pierce not only provide that, but they will take the pressure off Johnson and Lopez, who I’m guessing thrive, not having to worry about being team leaders as well as scorers.

Of course there is one big issue aside from age. How the heck do you ensure that come playoff time, they’re all healthy. Everyone is figuring that this five will really only be together during the course of the season about 50 games...the rest of the time it will be one nagging injury after another.

As for the Celtics, they are clearing the table for a major rebuilding effort. It was smart of them to do this.

“Open up the Honey Nut cheerios boxes and sprinkle a trail from Flatbush Avenue to the corner of 34th and Seventh, because now we get to find out whether the town is big enough for Carmelo Anthony...and Kevin Garnett.

“Here comes KG, The Big Ticket who makes the Brooklyn Nets a big ticket, and here comes Paul Pierce. The Truth, with him (along with Jason Terry), and here come the $100 Million Nets, coming to try to steal the town from Melo and the Knicks, coming for everyone. And here comes a City Game rivalry that will make the old Cold War with the Russians feel like a tempest in a teapot.

“When you have an insatiable, driven owner such as Mikhall Prokhorov, it isn’t enough to be King of Brooklyn – only King of all New York, at the very least, will do....

“Everyone knows Garnett is on his last legs, but his tongue is forever young, so Melo better hide the woman – ooh, La La – and children the minute Garnett steps off the bus in Brooklyn.

“He won’t be here for a terribly long time, of course; he is, after all, 37 years old, and Pierce is 35, proud old Celtics warriors no longer needed in the rebuilding project left behind by Doc Rivers, who bolted to the Clippers.”

Separately, the Nets made another good move in adding former coach and friend of Kidd’s, Lawrence Frank, to the staff. Number one, Frank, by all accounts, is just a real good guy and hardly a threat to Kidd. He’ll be a trusted confidant and he has tremendous experience, plus he served as an assistant under Doc Rivers in 2010-11, so he has a familiarity with Pierce and Garnett.

One other...the Nets need to re-sign Andray Blatche, who, with Mason Plumlee, will provide the needed backup on the front line.

--If the Knicks can re-sign J.R. Smith, point guard Pablo Prigioni and forward Chris Copeland, I’d feel a lot better about their prospects. But that’s a tall order, especially in the case of Copeland.

“At his best, Jeff Teague swells forward in aggressive surges that forge sinuous paths to the rim. But the 25-year-old Hawks point guard – and second-year starter – is feeling his way through the NBA and still vulnerable to drifting from game to game, play to play. It takes only a few moments for Teague’s creativity and energy to ebb and for all of his forward progress to subside into empty overdribbling.”

But now Teague is a free agent and after Chris Paul, the best point guard option available. The Hawks can extend a qualifying offer and will have the right to match any offer sheet he signs, but I’m guessing he leaves...and then Teague becomes a big question mark. He can still be a star.

Golf Balls

--At the U.S. Women’s Open at Sebonack, out on Long Island, 24-year-old South Korean Inbee Park was attempting to become the first in her sport to win the first three legs of the grand slam since Babe Zaharius did it in 1950. Only Mickey Wright (1961) and Pat Bradley (1986) have won three majors in one year. No woman has won four...and Park did indeed win her third straight by four this weekend. 

The Women’s British Open is in August at St. Andrews. Park also has a U.S. Open win on her resume from 2008.

--So I always glance at the first round leaderboard of an LPGA event to see if Michelle Wie is anywhere to be found and I didn’t see her name on the Women’s Open leaderboard Thursday or Friday. 

“The tweet hit the Internet at 7:13 p.m. Friday: ‘There are no words to explain how disappointed I am in myself right now.’

“It is unclear whether Michelle Wie wrote those words before or after she decided to blow off the final hole of her U.S. Women’s Open second round, which was scheduled to be completed starting at 7 a.m. yesterday because play was suspended by dense fog on Friday evening at Sebonack.

“How is it possible she does not know better by now after already making so many poor decisions in her career and seeing how scrutinized she is?

“Wie was not alone in quitting yesterday. Candie Kung, who like Wie was 11-over par, but had three holes to play, committed the same sin and did not provide the USGA with an explanation.

“Wie’s explanation to the USGA was ‘illness.’ I am always highly hesitant to question the nature or severity of an athlete’s injury, but the timing of her tummy ache is far too conspicuous to ignore....

“Wie owed it to the game of golf and the tournament to show up, show some class and common courtesy and act like a professional.

“Was it a bad break play was suspended when she had one hole to play to extend her miserable week? Sure. Was it an inconvenience? Sure.

“But this behavior is not acceptable at the lowest-profile LPGA Tour events and it certainly is not acceptable at a major championship.”

Wie has seven missed cuts and just two top-10s this year.

“What would it have cost Wie to show up and play one hole yesterday morning? Was she even going to be able to get out of town to wherever she’s going next on Friday night? After all, play was not suspended until 7 p.m.

“All Wie had to do was wake up early at whatever luxury hotel or home she was staying in this week, drive over to the golf course in her Lexus SUV courtesy car provided to all players, perhaps have a spot of breakfast in the lavish clubhouse, be carted out to the 18th tee and walk the 523 scenic yards along the Peconic Bay.

“Can you imagine the outrage that would ensue had this been Tiger Woods, Rory McIlroy or Phil Mickelson pulling something like this in a major championship?

“Wie’s week began with a quadruple-bogey on her first hole of the tournament, leading to an opening-round 80. Who knew her week would end on an even worse note?

“If Wie was as disappointed in herself as she indicated in her tweet Friday night, that disappointment should pale by comparison to the shame she should feel for being a quitter yesterday.”

And what a total failure she’s been. Oh yeah, her sponsors are so proud of her career.

She also embarrasses the hell out of Stanford, the dumbest grad the school has ever produced.

--20-year-old Jessica Korda fired her caddie midway through the third round of the Women’s Open as she turned to her boyfriend in the gallery and said, “Johnny, grab the bag, let’s go.”

The switch seemed to work. Korda was 5 over on the front nine, and 1 under the rest of the way, finishing with a 76 and tied for sixth at 1 over, 11 strokes behind leader Inbee Park.

Actually, the boyfriend, Johnny DelPrete, is a professional golfer himself, playing on the Web.com Tour in 2012.

--As for the men, great win by Wake Forest’s own Bill Haas, his fifth career title, in taking the AT&T event at Congressional. Haas had a career best 25 birdies, yet became the first to win after carding a triple bogey since Phil Mickelson in 2009.

--And 52-year-old Kenny Perry won his first major, the Senior Players Championship in Pittsburgh. Appearing in his first Champions Tour event since turning 50, Colin Montgomerie finished tied for ninth.

--Rory McIlroy missed the cut at the Irish Open, won by Paul Casey, as Rory’s problems continue heading into the British Open.

--Not exactly the Wimbledon many were expecting on the men’s side, with Rafael Nadal going down in the first round, and then Roger Federer doing the same in the second to 116th-ranked Sergiy Stakhovsky of Ukraine.

On the women’s side, Maria Sharapova fell in the second round to a qualifier, while second-seeded Victoria Azarenka withdrew due to injury.

And for the first time since 1912, no American men advanced to the third round! All 11 flamed out; not that any of these 11 were really worth a darn...18th-seeded John Isner, I believe, being the highest ranked of the group, which is really pathetic.

Meanwhile, No. 1 seeds Novak Djokovic and Serena Williams advanced.

--Ordinarily, I wouldn’t follow the NHL draft, but Seth Jones, 18, was taken with the fourth pick by Nashville. Jones is the son of former NBA player Popeye Jones, who while he was playing with the Denver Nuggets, asked Colorado Avalanche captain Joe Sakic for advice on nurturing Seth’s obsession with hockey.

--We note the passing of former New York Jets defensive back Jim Hudson, 70. According to his wife, the cause was Parkinson’s dementia, with doctors believing it had been caused by football-related trauma, and, at her husband’s request, his brain and spine are being given to researchers at Boston University.

Lise Hudson said Jim “wanted to (help) researchers come up with alternatives to protect players better, especially kids coming up.”

Hudson had a key interception in Super Bowl III against the Colts. Near the end of the second quarter, Colts quarterback Earl Morrall and running back Tom Matte engineered a flea-flicker, with Morrall ignoring a wide open Jimmy Orr and instead going for his fullback, Jerry Hill. Hudson intercepted the pass on the Jets’ 12-yard line. He made six tackles in the game.

Hudson was a college teammate at Texas of Jet receiver George Sauer, who starred himself in SB III. Hudson had 14 regular season interceptions in a six-year career, all in New York.

--Former NASCAR driver Kyle Petty, now an analyst on the SPEED channel, said Danica Patrick has “come a long way, but she’s still not a race car driver. And I don’t think she’ ever going to be a race car driver.”

Dale Earnhardt Jr., among others, said, “I have to disagree with Kyle. I think she’s a tough competitor. She works really hard at what she does and she has run some really good races.”

But the thing is, Patrick has finished in the top 15 only three times in 17 races this year (Patrick finishing 23rd this weekend in Kentucky...Matt Kenseth winning it). She has not led any laps or had a top-10 finish since her eighth-place result in the Daytona 500 to open the season.

--Following a lengthy investigation, the NCAA cited Oregon for failing to monitor its football program, placed it on probation for three years, penalized former coach Chip Kelly, levied a reduction in official visits, and it took away a scholarship....but...it stopped short of barring the Ducks from participating in bowl games, so like big deal.

The infractions committee found that Kelly had not adequately supervised the program, and placed a bogus “show-cause” penalty on him, but it pertains to any effort on his part the next 18 months to return to the college game and he’s now coach of the Philadelphia Eagles!

So as Derrick Coleman would have observed, “Whoopty-damn-do!”

--Good news on the wildlife front. The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration announced on Friday that the northeastern Pacific Ocean population of great white sharks is not in danger of extinction.

Sweet! Now get to work, boys...wreak some havoc. It’s always good for my ratings.

And remember, Whitey. Always assume anything in a black wet suit is a seal. Later, you can decide whether or not to spit it out. In other words, finish the play. Don’t assume the whistle.

--We had a local tragedy this weekend. A man from my town was rafting down the Delaware River with his 14-year-old daughter and a group of other rafters. Authorities had issued a warning because the water was high due to heavy rains this month and the current was swift. The man’s raft broke away from the others, flipped over, he died, and his daughter thankfully scrambled onto the bank.

I only bring this up because he wasn’t wearing a life jacket. People, when you’re out this summer, don’t be stupid.

Rome: “An Italian family of four has been left paralyzed after the grandmother of the household accidentally garnished their pasta with a poisonous plant, Italian media reports.

“Believing it to be a bitter green broccoli variant, she took it home and planted it in her herb collection.

“She sprinkled it on the family’s evening spaghetti on Monday and fell ill soon afterwards along with her husband, daughter and young grandson.

“They were taken to hospital and put into a medically-induced coma after another family member found them collapsing and vomiting....

“Devil’s Trumpet, which is officially known as Datura Metel, is highly toxic and can be fatal if ingested by humans or animals.

“The four are still in hospital but doctors said they were confident the paralysis would be temporary.”

--The Rolling Stones finally played Glastonbury, Saturday night, and as noted in a story in the Irish Independent:

“Mick Jagger and his band did not disappoint the 130,000-strong crowd in their eagerly-awaited debut at Britain’s biggest festival.”

But for the closing day, Sunday, talk about bizarre...Kenny Rogers is on the bill to sing “The Gambler.” The Brits have always had interesting tastes...the Irish too, from my many travels. The most popular pub song has always been “American Pie,” which is a great choice, but it’s just funny what is passed down through the generations.

Top 3 songs for the week 7/3/82: #1 “Don’t You Want Me” (The Human League...just horrid...) #2 “Rosanna” (Toto...I played Toto at a summer camp when I was like 4 or 5...Tony Award worthy performance, I was later told...) #3 “Ebony And Ivory” (Paul McCartney with Stevie Wonder...please, just shoot me...make it quick...)... and...#4 “Heat Of The Moment” (Asia...awful hot around parts of the Southwest this weekend...) #5 “Hurts So Good” (John Cougar...I like Little Anthony’s “Hurt So Bad” better...) #6 “Always On My Mind” (Willie Nelson...he mailed this one in...) #7 “Let It Whip” (Dazz Band...ughh ...) #8 “Love’s Been A Little Bit Hard On Me” (Juice Newton...tell me about it...) #9 “Eye Of The Tiger” (Survivor...I mean, seriously, this is one (lousy) week...)  #10 “Caught Up In You” (38 Special...these guys desperately need haircuts...or at least wash it, for crying out loud...)

San Francisco Giants Quiz Answers: 1) Six to hit 200 home runs: Willie Mays, 646; Barry Bonds, 586; Mel Ott, 511; Willie McCovey, 469; Matt Williams, 247; Orlando Cepeda, 226. 2) 135 RBI three times: Mel Ott...151 (1929), 135 (1934), 135 (1936)*.

*Your reading assignment for the week is to go to baseballreference.com and just remind yourself how great Mel Ott was. In all seriousness, perhaps the most underrated great player there ever was. [Others might say Tris Speaker, but I’m partial to those whose whole career is post-1920.]

Taking this week off for the holiday...and to make sure my parents are cared for...dual medical issues.

Next Bar Chat, Monday, July 8....but I might have a little Gettysburg note if I find the time.

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