Chicago White Sox Quiz (1901-2003): 1) When was the ChiSox
last World Series championship? The last pennant? 2) Who was
A.L. rookie of the year in 1983? 3) Name the only two to lead
the A.L. in home runs? 4) Who was the last A.L. MVP? 5) Who
was the last to lead the A.L. in ERA? 6) Who is the team leader
in career hits? 7) Who has the most career wins? Answers
below.
Smar-ty…Smar-ty…
Here we go again. You all know how badly I want a Triple
Crown winner, as should everyone else out there. I thought the
Preakness was fantastic. Not just because of Smarty Jones’s
spectacular performance, but the whole buildup at the start with
Rock Hard Ten, who will give Smarty a run at the Belmont. I
mean is Rock Hard Ten the biggest freakin’ horse you ever saw?
So now we wait three long weeks. Just like last year with Funny
Cide, the country could use a good shot in the arm these days.
But Funny Cide was no Smarty Jones. Get psyched.
Potpourri for $40…and other stuff
–200 years ago today the French Senate proclaimed France an
empire and Napoleon Bonaparte its emperor. Napoleon then
turned down Ronald Reagan’s request to allow our fighter jets to
fly over his country on the way to bombing Libya.
–Uh oh…the northern snakehead has been found at least twice in
the waters of the Potomac River. This could be the end of
civilization as we know it, because as you all learned in fish
school the female snakehead is capable of producing 15,000 little
snakeheads.
Now some experts, as I learned in the Washington Post
(snakehead central), say ‘Don’t worry,’ pointing to the Florida
experience with the northern snakehead’s cousin, the tropical
snakehead. Despite hundreds of thousands of them in Florida’s
waters, it doesn’t appear that any other species have been wiped
out by the voracious marauders.
But here’s something no one seems to be bringing up…what I
like to call a Bar Chat Exclusive. You already know that
snakeheads can exist out of water for decent stretches, which is
not only how they jumped from a few ponds into the Potomac
but why you should always keep at least a chain lock on the
door. But did you know snakeheads have been seen training
with Kenyans…the marathon runner variety? As Jimmy Stewart
said in the movie Shenandoah, “Ahhh ahhhh….now it concerns
us.”
–NASCAR is removing North Carolina Speedway’s last race
and one of two at Darlington in 2005, the former being better
known as Rockingham, replacing the two with races in Texas
and Arizona. I once ate about ten barbecue sandwiches at
Rockingham, and got one of just two speeding tickets in my life
heading to a race there…as I’ve probably mentioned way too
often already. And Nazareth Speedway in Pennsylvania is being
shut down this year, which sucks…not that I ever attended a race
there but you can’t say Nazareth without thinking of Mario
Andretti.
–Man’s Best Friend scores again. The other day a woman was
walking in Central Park when a man attempted to rape her, but
the woman’s 60-pound mutt lunged at the attacker, biting him on
the thigh and face, and though the man got away he left a ton of
blood at the scene thanks to the dog’s heroic efforts. The City is
going to give the pooch a big reward.
–Trader George used to regale me with tales of the giant
muskellunge found in the St. Lawrence Seaway and in reading
my copy of American Thunder (a new, solid magazine put out by
the NASCAR crowd), they recommend a few spots in the U.S.
where muskie of 45 inches in length and longer can be found,
for all you anglers out there.
Green River, Kentucky; Cave Run Lake, Kentucky; Lake
Shelbyville, Illinois; and Pomme De Terre Lake, Missouri.
Actually, I didn’t realize 37 of the lower 48 states have muskie
stocking programs. But remember, sports fans, muskie have
sharp fangs and can rip you apart if you’re not careful. They’ve
also been known to ram ocean liners, causing great damage. In
fact there are some who think the Titanic was really sunk by a
rogue muskie, not an iceberg.
[One item in the above story is probably not true. Can you pick
it out?]
–It costs $200,000 to $750,000 to have your very own 3- by 5-
inch decal on a Nextel Cup car.
–American Thunder picked its Top 50 Country CDs for those
just starting a collection. Most of the selections are greatest hit
compilations, like with Alan Jackson, Buck Owens, Hank
Williams and Ernest Tubb. But there are a few others, including
these.
Emmylou Harris – Wrecking Ball
Kelly Willis – One More Time
Lefty Frizzell – Look What Thoughts Will Do
Johnny Cash – At Folsom Prison
Jason and the Scorchers – Fervor
Kenny Chesney – No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems
Willie Nelson – Red Headed Stranger
Waylon Jennings – Dreaming My Dreams
Steve Earle – I Feel Alright
–Now I’m not a bourbon drinker, but did you know the
requirements for bourbon to be called that in the first place?
“It must, by law, be made from grain consisting of at least 51
percent corn, plus barley and one other grain (usually rye). It
must be aged in charred oak barrels. And nothing else can be
added prior to bottling. Any deviation from these rules and it
can’t be called bourbon. [Thus Jack Daniels and George Dickel,
both from Tennessee and filtered through sugar-maple charcoal,
don’t qualify.]”
Ellis Weiner / American Thunder
–Sports Illustrated has a list of the 50 richest American athletes,
combining salary or winnings (including bonuses) with
endorsements and appearance fees. They exclude foreign
athletes such as Michael Schumacher (who would have been #2
at $71 million), David Beckham ($30 million) and a bunch of
European hockey stars, for example. Here’s the Top Ten.
1. Tiger Woods…$76.7 million, $70 million of which is
endorsements.
2. Shaquille O’Neal…$40.5 million, $26.5 is salary
3. LeBron James…$39.0 mm, $35 million in endorsements. This
is incredible…he’s like freakin’ 19.
4. Peyton Manning…$36.4 mm
5. Kevin Garnett…$36.0 mm
6. Oscar De La Hoya…$32.0 mm
7. Andre Agassi…$27.0 mm
8. Kobe Bryant…$25.5 mm…$12 mm in endorsements, uh oh.
9. Derek Jeter…$25 mm…amazing…the guy is an All-Star, not
a superstar.
10. Grant Hill…$24.3 mm…equally amazing…but at least he’s
a good guy. [Love them guaranteed contracts, don’t ya Grant?!]
Among the others, A-Rod is #16 at ‘just’ $21 million due to the
fact he reconfigured his deal when he went to New York. #19 is
Barry Bonds at $19 million, #23 Serena Williams at $17.5 mm,
and #36 is Phil Mickelson at $15.8 mm ($14 million of which is
endorsements).
But here’s one that really stands out to me. The Los Angeles
Dodgers’ Shawn Green, #30 at $16.5 million. He’s a stiff!!!!!
–USA Today had a blurb the other day on two minor leaguers
who are both getting hit by pitches at a record pace. Carlos
Quentin, an OF in the Diamondbacks chain, was hit 18 times in
his first 30 games and Richie Weeks (Milwaukee), 14 in 30. The
minor league record is 40. And my brother’s hero, Ron Hunt, is
the major league record holder with 50 in 1971.
–Here’s one of those stories from the Old West, though it’s
taking place today. Luther Klump, 71, has been in jail for over a
year because he refused to keep his cows from grazing on federal
land in Arizona. Now authorities could round up the 28 chowing
down on a chunk of the Dos Cabezas Mountains owned by the
U.S. Bureau of Land Management, but they won’t for fear
Klump’s family members will shoot them; Klump himself
having threatened to use a gun. This is actually just one of
hundreds of disputes of a similar nature in the west. [High Plains
Journal]
–Star running back Ricky Williams says he’ll beat the drug rap
he just received, supposedly his second violation of NFL policy.
We wish Ricky the worst.
–The NCAA conducted a scary study on gambling in college
athletics. 35% of male athletes say they have bet on college
sports and 10% of females. [Hey, I want to party with those
girls!……..err, sorry. Just kidding.] Division III athletes are the
most likely to gamble, which doesn’t bother me one bit since I
don’t spend my Saturday afternoons watching D-III sporting
events, but 1.4% of Division I-A football players acknowledged
altering their performance to change the outcome of a game.
Since the figure has to be greater than that, it’s not an
inconsiderable number. In other words, it’s inevitable that a
huge scandal will break in the next two years in college football
or basketball.
–Looks like Missouri head basketball coach Quin Snyder is in a
heap of trouble, facing 17 violations for recruiting and other
alleged infractions according to a report on the NCAA
investigation. This was all so predictable. All you had to do was
look at his slick hair to know he was a dirtball.
–The other night lefthanders Tom Glavine of the Mets and
Randy Johnson of the Diamondbacks hooked up, Glavine
outdueling Johnson 1-0. What I didn’t know is how rare this
match-up of lefty 200-game winners was. According to Adam
Rubin of the Daily News, this was only the third time in big-
league history it had occurred; the others being Warren Spahn
(321 wins) against Billy Pierce (200) in 1962, and Lefty Grove
(248) against Earl Whitehill (204) in 1937.
I gotta tell you, I had never heard of Earl Whitehill and now I’m
embarrassed. He pitched from 1923-39 with Detroit,
Washington, Cleveland and the Cubs, going 218-185. The poor
guy died at a young age, 54, in 1954.
–It really is funny, as Johnny Mac was pointing out to me, how
the Texas Rangers finished last the past four seasons with the
likes of future Hall of Famers Alex Rodriguez, Ivan Rodriguez,
and Rafael Palmeiro, yet with all three gone are now 22-15 thru
Sunday’s action with a lineup consisting of household names
Michael Young, Laynce (sic) Nix, Kevin Mench, and Gerald
Laird. Baby, you gotta love it.
–My Kansas City Royals are 11-24…but I”m not giving up!
–Future Hall of Fame catcher Mike Piazza is now enthused
about the idea of playing first base most of the time from here
on. Piazza can’t believe how fresh his body is, he’s telling
teammates. Oh, if he had only reached this conclusion two years
ago. The damage has been done. He’ll never hit .300 again, nor
will he drive in 100. I like Piazza – I like his Playmate
girlfriends more – but he didn’t do the Mets any favors these past
few seasons.
–But Piazza did hit a big home run on Sunday and with the Mets
only two games under .500, it’s now appropriate for Mets fans to
sign off e-mails with “Let’s Go Mets!”
–How did Milwaukee”s Ben Sheets, who never struck out more
than ten batters in a game, suddenly mow down 18 on Sunday?
–You gotta hand it to the Lakers. No team has been written off
like they were in going down to San Antonio two games to none,
yet they came back to take the next four. Too bad I can’t stand
them. [Nice choke job by my Nets on Sunday, incidentally.]
–This is inside PGA Tour stuff, but if you caught the end of the
Byron Nelson, Lanny Wadkins was commenting on the amount
of time Jerry Kelly was taking on his shots, much to the chagrin
of playing partner Sergio Garcia. What Wadkins couldn’t say is
that Kelly is developing a reputation on tour as being a real first
class a-hole. [Sergio nonetheless captured his 4th tour title.]
–Anyone caught watching “Family Fear Factor” is subject to a
$250,000 fine and imprisonment.
Top 3 songs for the week of 5/18/74: #1 “The Streak” (Ray
Stevens) #2 “Dancing Machine” (The Jackson 5) #3 “The
Entertainer” (Marvin Hamlisch)
Chicago White Sox Quiz Answers: 1) The White Sox last won
the Series in 1917. Their last pennant was in 1959. 2) Ron
Kittle was rookie of the year in 1983. 3) Only two have ever
led the league in home runs: Bill Melton, 33 (1971); Dick
Allen, 37 (1972) and 32 (1974). 4) Frank Thomas was the last
MVP in 1994 (he was also MVP in ’93). 5) Last to lead in ERA:
Joel Horlen, 1967 (2.06). Gary Peters had led in ’66, 1.98. 6)
Luke Appling is the all-time leader in hits with 2,749. 7) Ted
Lyons has the most wins in a ChiSox uniform with 260. [260-
230]
Next Bar Chat, Thursday.
