NFL Quiz: Name the top ten in receptions all time. [Hint: 3 are
still active and No. 10 is at 851.] Answer below.
[Long day, Sunday, as I returned from Iowa….thus a brief chat
today.]
A week ago I wrote about the amazing comeback of the St. Louis
Cardinals’ Rick Ankiel and since then there have been a slew of
stories. But I thought the Washington Post’s Charles
Krauthammer best summed it up in his column this week.
“In the fable, the farm boy, phenom makes his way to the big city
to amaze the world with his arm. At a stop at a fair on the train
ride to Chicago, he strikes out the Babe Ruth of his time on three
blazing pitches. Enter the Dark Lady. Before he can reach the
stadium for his tryout, she shoots him and leaves him for dead.
“It is 16 years later and Roy Hobbs returns, but now as a hitter
and outfielder. [He can never pitch again because of the wound.]
He leads his team to improbable glory, ending the tale with a
titanic home run that, in the now-iconic movie image, explodes
the stadium lights in a dazzling cascade of white.
“In real life, the kid doesn’t look like Robert Redford, but he
throws like Roy Hobbs: unhittable, unstoppable. In his rookie
year, appropriately the millennial year 2000, he throws it by
everyone. He pitches the St. Louis Cardinals to a division title,
playing so well that his manager anoints him starter for the
opening game of the playoffs, a position of honor and – for 21-
year-old Rick Ankiel – fatal exposure.
“His collapse is epic. He can’t find the plate. In the third inning
he walks four batters and throws five wild pitches (something not
seen since 1890) before Manager Tony La Russa mercifully
takes him out of the game.
“The kid is never the same. He never recovers his control. Five
miserable years in the minors trying to come back. Injuries.
Operations. 2005, he gives up pitching forever.
“Then last week, on Aug. 9, he is called up from Triple-A. Same
team. Same manager. Rick Ankiel is introduced to a roaring
Busch Stadium crowd as the Cardinals’ starting right fielder.
“In the seventh inning, with two outs, he hits a three-run home
run to seal the game for the Cardinals. Two days later, he hits
home runs and makes one of the great catches of the year – over
his shoulder, back to the plate, full speed.
“But the play is more than spectacular. It is poignant. It was an
amateur’s catch. Ankiel ran a slightly incorrect route to the ball.
A veteran outfielder would have seen the ball tailing to the right.
But pitchers aren’t trained to track down screaming line drives
over their heads. Ankiel was running away from home plate but
slightly to his left. Realizing at the last second that he had run up
the wrong prong of a Y, he veered sharply to the right, falling
and sliding into the wall as he reached for the ball over the wrong
shoulder.
“He made the catch. The crowd, already delirious over the two
home runs, came to its feet. If this had been a fable, Ankiel
would have picked himself up and walked out of the stadium into
the waiting arms of the lady in white – Glenn Close in a halo of
light – never to return.
“But this is real life. Ankiel is only 28 and will continue to play.
The magic cannot continue. If he is lucky, he’ll have the career
of an average right fielder. But it doesn’t matter. His return after
seven years – if only three days long – is the stuff of legend.
Made even more perfect by the timing: Just two days after Barry
Bonds sets a synthetic home-run record in San Francisco, the
Natural returns to St. Louis.
“Ronald Reagan, I was once told, said he liked ‘The Natural’
except that he didn’t understand why the Dark Lady shoots Roy
Hobbs.
“Reagan, the preternatural optimist, may have had difficulty
fathoming tragedy, but no one knows why Hobbs is shot. It is
fate, destiny, nemesis. Perhaps the dawning of knowledge, the
coming of sin. Or more prosaically, the catastrophe that awaits
everyone from a single false move, wrong turn, fatal encounter.
Every life has such a moment. What distinguishes us is whether
– and how – we ever come back.”
Stuff
–According to reports, Tim Donaghy is going to rat out up to 20
fellow NBA referees who gamble, most likely in casinos, which
is a fireable offense under their contract. NBA refs aren’t even
allowed on a casino floor, nor can they bet on horse racing. Who
the heck would want the job then?!
What’s become very clear, however, is that Donaghy was not the
“rogue” element that NBA Commissioner David Stern first said
he was; Stern not knowing squat even to this day. Stern’s also
always been a very irritating sort, know what I’m sayin’? And if
you think I’m off-base, ask yourself this; do you really think
David Stern is the kind of guy who would sit down with any of
us good, down to earth folks for a beer and bar chat? Doubtful.
By the way, regarding the coming season, is there anyone who is
the least bit interested? Seriously, do Celtics fans really care that
the Garnett era is about to begin? I didn’t think so. Wake me up
next April and remind me to glance at the standings at that point.
–College Football
AP Top Ten
1. USC
2. LSU
3. West Virginia
4. Texas
5. Michigan
6. Florida
7. Wisconsin
8. Oklahoma
9. Virginia Tech
10. Louisville
16. Rutgers
Sports Illustrated’s Top Ten
1. USC
2. LSU
3. Florida
4. West Virginia
5. Louisville
6. Michigan
7. Virginia Tech
8. Texas
9. Oklahoma
10. Wisconsin
12. Rutgers
Interesting how both have the same top ten.
And now…….your EXCLUSIVE Bar Chat selection to go all the
way……………USC! [They’re loaded…you’d have to be an
idiot not to go with them.]
SI has my Demon Deacons No. 30. Unfortunately, we start out
with Boston College, away, and Nebraska (a consensus top 20),
home. SI laid out a prospective bowl schedule and has Wake
playing South Florida on Dec. 29 in Charlotte at the Meineke Car
Care Bowl. Hey, guys? I’m not going to this one; unless Norm
throws a party at his lake house.
–Out of 119 schools playing Division I football, Florida
International is ranked last, ahead of Buffalo.
–What’s the deal with Duke reinstating their top linebacker after
he pointed a gun and had a DUI? The guy is missing just the
opening game. If this happened to a Wake Forest player, I’d
hope he was kicked out of school…because of the gun aspect.
–Mike Lupica / New York Daily News: “In a year when the
majors nearly pitched a shutout against Tiger Woods, he ends up
hitting the golf equivalent of a walk-off home run in the PGA.”
–I’m thinking Michael Vick has “Idiot” and “Dirtball of the
Year” awards sown up. “Jerk of the Year” is another story,
though. All dirtballs are also jerks, but the “Jerk” title has to go
to someone who is not necessarily malicious………like Jason
Giambi, who was pardoned by Baseball Commissioner Bud
Selig.
–Des Moines seems like a nice community and on Saturday I
drove all over some of the neighborhoods and there were more
than a few streets I could live on. But I was wondering why
gymnastics seemed to be in the headlines a lot. Turns out the
best in the country these days hails from Des Moines…15-year-
old Shawn Johnson.
–Goodness gracious…at the Iowa State Fair I saw Superbull…
he weighed in at 3,322 lbs.! And then there was the famous
Butter Cow, which the dairy folks have been putting together
since the early 1900s. It’s a full-size cow, sports fan; some 600-
1,000 lbs. and all in butter. Which means you could butter
19,200 slices of toast with it….if you were so inclined.
–John Wayne was born in Winterset, Iowa…a town of about
5,000. Just like so many other famous Americans from the early
1900s, Wayne, born Marion Robert Morrison, had such humble
beginnings. The house, well-preserved, is very small. But I was
told the town had quite a celebration this past May 26, the
centennial of his birth. Over 40,000 showed up, including some
of Wayne’s kids.
The small rooms are crammed with pictures of Wayne during his
Hollywood days for the most part, but there is also a page from
the guest book, 11/3/84. As Ronald Reagan was wrapping up
his final campaign, he stopped by Winterset and signed the
register… “Ronald Reagan…1600 Pennsylvania Ave.” You
gotta love it.
[By contrast, John Wayne’s homes in the Newport Beach area of
Southern California were torn down…which is what they do in
that part of the country. No sense of history whatsoever.]
–So only two players in baseball history have had 20 doubles,
triples, home runs and stolen bases in a season…Frank Schulte,
1911, Chicago Cubs, and Willie Mays, 1957, New York Giants.
But this year Philadelphia’s Jimmy Rollins and Detroit’s Curtis
Granderson both have a super shot at accomplishing the feat.
Granderson…30 2B…19 3B…16 HR…14 SB
Rollins………30 2B…15 3B…22 HR…25 SB
I gotta tell ya….never heard of Frank Schulte…or what probably
happened is I killed the brain cell responsible for the 1911 Cubs
in Vienna, or Deadwood.
–Holy Cow! Did you catch that game by Arizona pitcher Micah
Owings on Saturday evening? Playing in his home state of
Atlanta for the first time as a major leaguer, Micah not only
pitched seven innings for the win, but he went 4 for 5 at the plate
with two home runs and six RBIs! One of his drives went 445
feet! It turns out back in high school he threatened the national
home run record.
–I saw this story in Saturday’s Des Moines Register.
“An incoming Iowa State freshman athlete is missing in Africa,
and his coach is worried about his well-being, the university
reported Friday in a news release.”
It turns out the kid, a runner recruited and admitted this spring,
“left his home in Eritrea’s capital of Asmara in late June with the
intention of making his way to Ethiopia and then Kenya in order
to process his I-20 student visa at the American Embassy in
Nairobi. He has not been heard from since and reportedly does
not appear on International Committee of the Red Cross lists of
recent refugees into Ethiopia.”
That’s awful. The problem is the U.S. Embassy in Eritrea is not
allowed to issue visas to Eritreans seeking to study at American
universities. The school hasn’t heard from him for two months
and the fear is he was arrested and taken to a detention center in
a remote location in the Horn of Africa.
–Yikes!! From the AP:
“An orange tarantula with venomous fangs was rescued Friday
after its owner in Smithtown, NY, said he could no longer care
for it.
“ ‘This is the kind of spider that nightmares are made of,’ said
Roy Gross of the SPCA. He said the spider is aggressive and can
jump 3 feet and bite with its large fangs. The bites are dangerous
to humans.
“The spider, known as an ornate golden baboon, has a body 5
inches long that is covered in orange hair. Males can have leg
spans of about 8 inches; the females are even larger.
“Gross said he was glad the owner, whose name was not
released, called the SPCA instead of dumping the spider.
“ ‘This spider is so aggressive, it will bite you just to bite you,’
he said.”
But now I’m confused. Is it a baboon or a spider? And how do
these monsters get in this country in the first place? Here we’re
all worried about al Qaeda types and we should be just as
concerned about the ornate golden baboon.
–SI’s “Sign of the Apocalypse”: “A youth football tournament in
Cincinnati called the Peace Bowl was halted when a man was
fatally shot near the field.”
–Jeff B. and I are trying to figure out whether “For Worse…”
creator Lynn Johnston is still alive. Jeff swears a bunch of
chimps have been drawing the strip, which makes sense since all
the characters look the same and chimps aren’t known for being
able to differentiate between, say, a Mexican and a Canadian.
Anyway, the chimps are torturing us with Grandpa Jim, who is
insufferable…as are FBOW’s final days. As for Liz and
Anthony, I’m more convinced than ever they elope; that is if the
chimps understand what this entails.
–Check this out…Monica Oswald of Neptune, NJ, may have
bagged a world record fluke…38 ¼ inches and weighing in at
24.3 pounds. The record on the books is 22 lbs. 7 ounces, reeled
in by the late Capt. Charlie Nappi at Montauk, NY, back in 1975.
[Of course Don Imus was referring to this gentleman when he
got fired, but no one understood this at the time.]
–So I’m driving around Iowa and they have some great radio
stations in the Des Moines area; one of which was 1350 AM,
KRNT, which had a nice mix of easy listening tunes.
But when was the last time you really listened to the lyrics to the
5th Dimension’s “One Less Bell To Answer”? Geezuz, it’s
depressing. Then the next tune up was Helen Reddy’s “You And
Me Against The World”… ‘When one of us is gone…and one of
us is left to carry on…” I mean I was ready to drive off the road,
except I would have just ended up in corn.
–Beer of choice in Iowa for yours truly was ‘312’ of Chicago.
[Pronounced ‘three one two.’]
Top 3 songs for the week of 8/23/75: #1 “Fallin’ In Love”
(Hamilton, Joe Frank & Reynolds) #2 “One Of These Nights”
(Eagles) #3 “Get Down Tonight” (K.C. & The Sunshine Band)
…and…#4 “Jive Talkin’” (Bee Gees) #5 “Rhinestone Cowboy”
(Glen Campbell) #6 “Why Can’t We Be Friends?” (War) #7
“How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You)” (James Taylor…this
one isn’t aging well in the eyes of your editor) #8 “Someone
Saved My Life Tonight” (Elton John) #9 “At Seventeen” (Janis
Ian) #10 “Please Mr. Please” (Olivia Newton-John)
NFL Quiz Answer: Top Ten pass receptions –
1. Jerry Rice…1,549…14.8 avg
2. Cris Carter…1,101…12.6
3. Tim Brown…1,094…13.7
4. Marvin Harrison*…1,022…13.4
5. Andre Reed…951…13.9
6. Art Monk…940…13.5
7. Isaac Bruce*…887…15.1
8. Jimmy Smith…862…14.3
9. Keenan McCardell*…861…12.9
10. Irving Fryar…851…15.0
11. Rod Smith*…849…13.4
17. Terrell Owens*…801…14.6
*active
Next Bar Chat, Thursday.
