NFL Quiz: Career scoring leaders. Gary Anderson, George
Blanda, and Morten Andersen occupy the first three places on the
all-time list. Who holds the next 3 slots? Answer below.
Joe D”s last days…and the autographed baseballs
In Richard Ben Cramer”s new bestseller, “Joe DiMaggio: The
Hero”s Life,” he writes of the Yankee Clipper”s final few months
and the manner in which he was cheated out of several hundred
thousand dollars in memorabilia by his lawyer and friend Morris
Engelberg.
Back in September 1998, George Steinbrenner acquiesced to
grant Joe DiMaggio one last day of honor at Yankee Stadium.
Steinbrenner saw no need to hold one at the time, but Engelberg
and Joe D. pressured George to go through with it. And so on
September 27 a hastily put together ceremony took place before
the Yankees – Tampa Bay game. It was so poorly thought out
that in the beginning the scoreboard read, “Joltin” Joe
Dimaggio,” no capitalization for the “M.” And then the
scoreboard showed newsreel footage, including the day Joe got
thrown out of Marilyn Monroe”s house. Plus Joe was driven
around the stadium in a T-bird convertible, a car he despised.
The microphone didn”t work, so DiMaggio never gave his
speech that Engelberg had written for him, and Joe Torre never
got a chance to read the proclamation that Mayor Giuliani had
prepared. The whole scene was a joke as DiMaggio tottered
around the field.
Behind the scenes, however, DiMaggio, realizing he was very
sick, and hiding this fact from his business partner Engelberg,
wanted one last chance to pump up his estate. And so part of the
deal behind Joe DiMaggio Day was the sale of up to 15,000
autographed baseballs. Engelberg hoped to get $400 a pop, or
close to $5 million profit. And even if Engelberg sold them for
wholesale, $200, that would net close to $3 million.
Morris, however, didn”t know exactly how ill Joe D. was. And
the real issue is that Engelberg allegedly made a secret deal to
get 2,000 baseballs made specially for Joe DiMaggio Day, with
the intent of having them unwittingly signed and then sold for his
own gain without DiMaggio”s knowledge.
Engelberg had gained DiMaggio”s trust during the course of the
1990s because he had made Joe D. more money than he had with
his previous managers.
But two weeks after Joe D. Day, DiMaggio was in the hospital
down in Florida, though the nation didn”t know it until a week
later when it was time for him to throw out the first pitch at the
World Series.
“Joe DiMaggio has walking penumonia,” the AP quoted Morris
Engelberg (“attorney and longtime friend”). “He”s fine…he”s
eating like a horse.”
Engelberg, according to author Cramer, thus started his pattern of
lies about DiMaggio”s condition. And I”m sure all of you
remember this time. “He”ll eventually be out…maybe three or
four days.”
The hospital was closemouthed about information. All
inquiries were to be directed through Engelberg. And Morris
told the press on various occasions that Joe D. was fine, sitting
up and watching television.
But it turns out that two days after DiMaggio had initially been
admitted to the hospital, doctors removed a cancerous tumor in
his right lung. Soon he couldn”t talk and didn”t know who was
in the room. But all the while Engelberg was issuing misleading
statements, the baseballs were being auctioned off on the
Internet. And then the doctors took over and began to relay the
truth about the cancer. It was now Christmas, and the price for
DiMaggio memorabilia was sky high.
After being in a coma for a time, one which the doctors thought
would prove fatal, DiMaggio came out of it. Cramer writes:
“He couldn”t talk, unless they unhooked him from his ventilator
and even then it was only a rasping few words…(but) he sat up
more. He knew who came into his room. He made signals with
his hands.”
Morris Engelberg noticed Joe D.”s hands seemed fine. Cramer
adds, “Later, Engelberg would sell sixty-eight Yankee Clipper
balls, with pen marks upon them…which were Joe”s attempted
signatures on the balls Morris gave him in the hospital.”
As for the other memorabilia, Engelberg denies the claims made
in Cramer”s book. Of the charge that he had taken the funds
from 2,000 baseballs, Engelberg said later, “That is absolutely
ridiculous…An outright lie…Why would I ”scam” a few
thousand dollars from Joe DiMaggio? Anything I asked from
him, he always said yes.”
We”ll probably never know the truth. What we do know is that
DiMaggio”s condition was covered up those last few months. Or
was Engelberg fulfilling Joe D.”s wish, as Morris puts it, that the
public not know the facts? Regardless, it”s a sad, pitiful tale.
[Sources: Newsweek, Associated Press]
Bear Chat, Part 76
In our ongoing effort to ensure that you are armed with all the
right information, some Canadian researchers have been studying
bears in Russian Kamchatka for the past 5 summers and have
reached the conclusion that humans can live in close contact with
them.
The research team (a man and woman who aren”t married)
shacks up in a cabin surrounded by 400 huge brown bears, the
equivalent to Canadian grizzlies, and have reportedly had 1,000
encounters with the bears over the period. They claim that bears
display incredible “tenderness” and “they obviously like us.”
One even leaves her cubs for the researchers to baby sit.
The two bruin watchers also claim that if you use a soothing
voice you won”t be attacked. Now this flies in the face of
conventional wisdom, which holds you should be loud and noisy
when in the woods to scare them off, and equally loud if
confronted.
For the final word, however, we turn to the Russian director of
the World Wildlife Fund who basically says the Canadians are
full of it.
“Bears kill people in Russia every year. There are unprovoked
attacks every year. Bears are an unpredictable animal and should
be treated as unpredictable.” [Source: Toronto Globe & Mail]
London Monuments
The new mayor of London, Ken Livingstone, a politician who is
so far left he has been given the moniker “Red Ken,” says he
wants to replace some of London”s monuments honoring
colonial governors and field marshalls. For example, the statue
to Gen. Robert Clive, the “conqueror of India.”
But as the Washington Post”s T.R. Reid points out, one general
who is targeted for removal is none other than General Charles
Napier, who captured the province of Sindh in what is now
Pakistan. “We have no right to seize Sindh, but we shall do so,”
Napier declared.
Napier has a strong following among Latin students because of a
famous pun he dispatched from the front in 1843. Reporter Reid
relates:
“As his superiors anxiously awaited news about his attack on
Sindh, Napier sent back a message bearing a single word:
”Peccavi.” That”s a past tense form of the Latin verb pecco,
meaning ”I sin.” In other words, ”I have Sindh.””
Second Brain
Scientists from the world renowned Max Planck Institute in
Munich (where our own Dr. Bortrum has done some work…at a
separate branch) believe they have discovered a second brain in
the stomach. Professor Wolfgang Prinz said, “People often
follow their gut reactions without even knowing why…But we
now believe that there is a lot more to gut feelings than was
previously believed.” Billions of nerve cells similar to those in
parts of the brain have been found in the digestive tract.
Frog in Salad
The other day in London, a woman opened a bag of salad to find
a live European tree frog. Luckily for the frog, the woman was
an animal lover and the frog is now residing in a London zoo.
She thought the little amphibian was cute. I just hope she
washed the salad afterwards.
Cher
You”ll notice below that Cher has the number one song for the
week highlighted. Which makes it a good excuse to slam one of
the true idiots on the planet. If you like her as an entertainer,
fine. Just skip the following.
Cher has penned a new song, “Sisters of Mercy,” which details
her childhood in a Catholic orphanage. Some of it goes.
“Sisters of Mercy, they always weave the web of lies and wrap
you in their wicked spell.”
The rest is a lot worse, comparing the nuns to the devil and other
nonsense. As a Catholic I take more than a little offense at this
garbage. The Catholic League responded, “It”s another instance
of Hollywood and the entertainment industry using Catholic
imagery in a negative way to try and sell their wares.”
Cher said the song was a condemnation of the particular order,
not Catholics in general. “I have known many wonderful and
loving nuns in my life.” Me too. Just think before you write or
say something, Cher. You”re no better than Allen Iverson.
But wait…there”s more.
I commented during the Democratic Convention that
Republicans should pray Cher is campaigning for Al Gore.
When asked about the election and the possibility of a President
Bush she responded, “Has everyone lost their f%@king minds?
Doesn”t anybody remember the illustrious Reagan-Bush years
when people had no money and no jobs? What has happened to
people”s memories? It”s like they have Alzheimer”s or
something.”
Then Cher added, “If you”re black in this country, if you”re a
woman in this country, if you are any minority in this country at
all, what could possibly possess you to vote Republican?”
[Source: New York Post]
Hey, I don”t care whom you voted for on Tuesday. But when a
spokesperson (which is what Cher became for the Gore
campaign) runs around, not knowing the facts and foaming at the
mouth, it”s time to rant. But I have to admit, “Baby Don”t Go” is
one of my all-time favorites!
Top 3 songs for the week of 11/6/71: #1 “Gypsys, Tramps, &
Thieves” (Cher…or, “Red Cher”) #2 “Theme From Shaft”
(Isaac Hayes) #3 “Maggie May” (Rod Stewart).
*Special thanks to Harry K. for passing some of the above stories
along.
Quiz Answer – Norm Johnson (#4), Nick Lowery (#5), and Jan
Stenerud (#6).
*Geezuz, how many times has a NFL coach quit while his team
was still above .500 the way Detroit”s Bobby Ross just did?
Lions owner William Clay Ford said, “I think he felt that he just
burned himself out physically and mentally, that he didn”t have
any more to give.” Heck, I guess not. If you see Mr. Ross
walking around your town, give him lots of space. [It needs to
be noted that Ross was a helluva coach, at least in the eyes of this
reporter.]
Next Bar Chat, Friday…Veterans Day and the story of the
Sullivan Brothers.
