[Bar Chat returns Wednesday]
Cincinnati Reds Quiz (1901 – ): 1) Most RBI, season? 2) Most
years, non-pitcher? [Hint: Two players with 19] 3) Most
strikeouts, season? [Hint: Think 70s or 80s] 4) Most grand
slams, career? Answers below.
Memorial Day
A letter from Lt. Robert L. Fowler III, aboard the U.S.S. Duncan
during World War II, to his wife. [sic]
“Just a hurried line to tell you that I still am OK alive & kicking,
kicking like hell in fact at the lousy…life on this crate.
Haven”t been ashore now for five weeks and don”t expect to get
there for perhaps another five – God but these things get small
after that amount of time on board.
“Love, I”m sorry for writing ridiculous letters like this but it
makes me happy to scrawl on and on about you and all our life
together; seems so far from what I am now doing far from war
and Destroyers and oceans.”
–Lieutenant Fowler was killed later that month in the South
Pacific.
Stuff
–Harry K. had more computer problems. This time an “idiot
using a backhoe” did a number on his phone line. Harry, is it not
possible that the man was really digging for the rare Canadian
broadband weasel?!
Anyway, Harry informs me that per my earlier discussion of the
zebra mussel, they actually have helped improve the water
quality of the Great Lakes by filtering out the wastes, but in
doing so, their toxin-filled carcasses are lining the lake bottoms.
Also, regarding my story on sharks and their attraction to wet
suits, Harry”s sources tell him that a solution would be to design
them with horizontal white and black stripes, thus replicating the
look of the pilot fish, those little suckers that swim around with
sharks and clean their teeth. Sharks then would think the surfer
wearing “pilot garb” could actually be their dental hygienist, thus
maybe setting up an appointment and nothing more.
–Elsewhere on the animal front, here in Honolulu, I called up
our family friend Dan D. to see how he was doing. In the midst
of a discussion about Hawaii”s drought (and I didn”t know that
rain in Oahu”s mountains can take up to 12 years for it to find its
way into a Honolulu tap), Dan casually mentioned the problem
with the pigs, before he went back to talk of water. Wohh, wait
a second there, Dan. What”s this about the pigs? It turns out that
because of the drought, the wild boars are working their way down
from the hills and wreaking havoc on the farms. Families are
encouraged to call in a professional pig hunter. These are truly
wicked, nasty animals that must be dealt with by force. Dan, I
recommend a B-52 strike. But let”s wait until “Pearl Harbor” has
gone to video.
Dan also had an interesting comment concerning our recent Hall
of Fame series. He said he was embarrassed he didn”t recognize
some of the names. Don”t be. You”re right, we need fewer
teams. Forget lopping off Montreal and one to three others.
Let”s reduce the majors back to 16 clubs. Then we”d see some
real baseball. Sorry, Colorado…this means no Rockies…you”re
making a mockery of the record book anyway. Unless you move
your fences back to 480” down the line, 645” in dead center.
–Here”s a bit from my favorite publication, High Plains Journal.
“Worms good, moths bad for no-tiller.”
It seems that Joe Swanson of McPherson County, KS is an
unabashed fan of worms.
“Worms are a soil building machine,” said Swanson. “I can
show you in my yard how worms have built my soil by one and
one-half inches over the last 30 years. They take the residue and
pass it through their systems.”
Ya know what I”m thinkin”? Old Joe may have come up with a
solution for a problem with global warming…rising sea levels.
Why if we just stick a couple trillion worms on the coast, the
natural build up in soil would counteract the rising water! Well?!
–So I saw where Japanese adventurer Hyoichi Kohno may have
met his untimely end. Kohno just left the North Pole on March
27 in his solo quest to then trek home to his native Japan
(reaching it in 2007!) by kayak, sled, skis, and foot…traversing
through Canada, Alaska and Russia.
But, alas, experts who lost contact with him this past Thursday
surmise he may have slipped through thin ice. To which I can
only think that his last word was, “Dohh!”
–While in Hong Kong, I went to the Museum of Art, not
knowing what was on display. It was a freakin” cubist exhibit
from France. Man, I hate cubists! Know what I”m sayin”? Give
me a Monet any day…but no cubist! [The preceding was
sponsored by “Impressionists for a better America.”]
Top 3 songs for the week of 5/29/65: #1 “Help Me, Rhonda”
(The Beach Boys!!!!!!) #2 “Ticket To Ride” (The Beatles) #3
“Back In My Arms Again” (The Supremes)
Baseball Tidbits:
–Fewest bases on balls (150 or more games)
A.L. – Ozzie Guillen, Chicago (1996). Guillen walked just 10
times in 499 at-bats. At least he hit .263. Compare that to…
N.L. – Hal Lanier, San Francisco (1961). This truly awful player
hit .206 with just 12 walks in 486 at-bats, for what has to be the
worst on-base percentage in the history of baseball.
–Fewest strikeouts, season (150 or more games)
A.L. – Joe Sewell, 4. In 1925, Sewell hit .336 with 204 hits in
608 at bats. [He also had 98 ribbies on just one home run]
Then in 1929, he also whiffed the same number, and went an
incredible 115 games and 437 ABs without striking out once during
the stretch. Sewell hit .315 that ”29 campaign. For his career,
Joe Sewell whiffed just 114 times in 7132 at bats, while hitting
.312 with 1051 RBIs. [Sewell is in the Hall of Fame.]
N.L. – Charlie Hollocher fanned just 5 times for the 1922
Chicago Cubs, while getting 201 hits in 592 at bats. For his all
too short career, Hollocher hit .304 (1918-1924).
–And then there is the flipside. Lee “Wes” Bales struck out 4
times in his first major league game, Atlanta 1966. He went 1
for 16 in his brief call-up that season and was 3 for 27 for
Houston in ”67, thus finishing his career, 4 for 43, a sterling .093
batting average. But Wes, you made it to Bar Chat!
Congratulations. And as a prize, here”s the home version of Bar
Chat: The Game! [All Rights Reserved.]
–We mourn the passing of Whitman Mayo, a k a Grady Wilson
from Sanford & Son.
–Hmm…saw where Florida”s Teddy Dupay, a star on the
basketball team, may have been involved with a bookmaker. Not
too bright, Teddy.
–An article in U.S. News addresses the issue of the “senior
slump” for high school students. When I was in school, we kind
of coasted just the last quarter or so. I didn”t realize that these
days, kids basically take the whole year off. In one particular
survey, only 36% of seniors say they do six or more hours of
homework a week. That”s pretty disgraceful, in my book. Most
folks blame it on the prevalence of “early admission” policies for
college.
–According to the Barbecue Industry Association, men do 67%
of the grilling, women 33%.
Cincinnati Reds Quiz Answers: 1) RBI, season: George Foster,
149 (1977.geezuz, I feel old) 2) Most years, non-pitcher: Pete
Rose and Davey Concepcion with 19. 3) Strikeouts, season:
Mario Soto, 274 (1982) 4) Grand slams, career: Johnny Bench,
11.
Reds Tidbits:
20-game winners in the 1960s: Joey Jay (I always loved that
name), 1961 (21-10) and 1962 (21-14). Finished career at 99-91.
Arm problems. Bob Purkey went 23-5 in 1962, and 129-115 for
his career, spanning 13 seasons. Sammy Ellis went 22-10 in
1965, but arm problems limited him to just a 63-58 career mark.
And then there was Jim Maloney. He could have been one of the
all-time greats, but, yes, arm problems cut short a brilliant start.
Maloney was finished by age 31, but had gone 134-84, striking
out 1605 in 1849 innings, a 3.19 ERA and 2 no-hitters. Maloney
was also a 20-game winner in ”63 and ”65. If that staff had
stayed healthy.
Bar Chat will return on Wednesday, after a break for Memorial
Day. I promise some music stories over the coming weeks.
