Baseball Quiz: 1) Who are the only two who finished their
careers after 1960 with at least 150 triples? 2) Name the top five
all time in doubles. [Hint: Final seasons were 1928 (2), 1963,
1986, 1993.] 3) Who is the active career leader in doubles?
Answers below.
**Congratulations to Craig Parry of Australia, and a heartfelt
thank you from the many golf fans out there for giving us all
another special moment at Doral this weekend. I know some of
you aren’t the biggest fans of the sport, but there’s a reason why
many of us watch each week, especially on Sundays, because no
other sport consistently supplies the kind of drama that golf does.
The Great Water Scam
Nigel Hawkes had a brilliant piece in the London Times the other
day concerning bottled water. Hawkes ridiculed Coca-Cola’s
recent decision to bottle the tapwater from a London suburb,
Sidcup, as the company claims it’s improving the product by
removing the chlorine. As Hawkes notes, though, this would
mean that once the bottle is open you’d have to drink it within a
day or so to eliminate the risk of bacterial spoilage. But then he
goes on.
“Few products rely more on pseudo-science than bottled water.
Some of the claims are so laughable that they are surely not
meant to be taken seriously…
“For years, otherwise sensible people have been persuaded that
their sense of thirst is not enough to tell them when to drink. A
myth sustained by the water bottlers insists that we all drink too
little water, and would be healthier and better people if we drank
more.
“The idea has a persuasive hold, to judge by the number of
young people seen wandering around clutching plastic bottles.
They have become as vital an accessory as a mobile phone,
fueled by the mantra ‘eight by eight’ – the assertion that we all
need to drink eight glasses of water a day, each containing eight
ounces. According to the authorized version, nothing else will
do. Tea, coffee, or alcoholic drinks don’t count towards the
target because they have a diuretic effect.
“Where on earth did this come from? For the whole of human
history men and women took a drink when they were thirsty, and
desisted when they weren’t. The sense of thirst is an exquisitely
sensitive way of telling you when you need to drink. Where is
the evidence that drinking more than we want could have any
benefits at all?”
Hawkes then notes the work of Heinz Valtin of Dartmouth
Medical School who concluded in The American Journal of
Physiology that this myth had no basis in fact.
“Nor it is true, he says, that caffeinated drinks don’t count. They
do, and so do weak alcoholic drinks such as beer, in moderation.
For healthy adults living in a temperate climate leading sedentary
lives – just the kind of people never seen without a plastic bottle
– the injunction to drink more water is nonsense.”
Another study in The Journal of the American College of
Nutrition from last April “showed that people who drank only
fruit juice, soft drinks and coffee were no more or less hydrated
than a second group who added plain water to their diet.”
Hawkes concludes, “So who’s kidding whom? Water may
indeed be the stuff of life, but there’s no need to stuff ourselves
with it. And paying over the odds for bottled water tasting
faintly of plasticizer is madness. Turn on the tap. It takes just a
fraction of a second, and costs nothing.”
So there you have it. I just saved some of you enough money to
enable you to upgrade to premium beer.
Stuff
–The Sopranos: And you thought that all my bear stories from
New Jersey were made up? Huh…I think not.
–Harry K. passed along this rather bizarre clip of an accident at a
circus from the Pattaya Mail, a newspaper in Thailand.
“Hippo eats dwarf”
“A dwarf, nicknamed Od, died when he bounced sideways from
a trampoline and was swallowed by a yawning hippopotamus,
which was waiting to appear in the next act.”
Vets on the scene said it was the first time the animal had eaten a
circus performer.
“Unfortunately, the 1,000-plus spectators continued to applaud
wildly until commonsense dictated there had been a tragic
mistake.”
Oh, who cares if this was real or not (the Pattaya Mail is). You
all know hippos are the most dangerous beast in the animal
kingdom. Dwarfs should know this too.
But even if the above does seem strange, the following are all
very real.
Curious Deaths of Some Burmese Kings
Anawrahta – gored by a buffalo during a military campaign. (1077).
Uzana – trampled to death by an elephant. (1254)
Narathihapate – forced at knifepoint to take poison. (1287)
Minrekyawswa – crushed to death by his own elephant. (1417)
Razadarit – died after becoming entangled in the rope with which
he was lassoing elephants. (1423)
Tabinshweti – beheaded by his chamberlains while searching for
a fictitious white elephant. (1551…ya see a pattern here?)
Nandabayin – laughed to death when informed, by a visiting
Italian merchant, that Venice was a free state without a king.
(1599…imagine what would have happened if Jonathan Winters
was in the court?!)
[Source: “Schott’s Original Miscellany,” Ben Schott]
And while we’re perusing the above book, here is a list of the
Bond Girls.
Dr. No…Ursula Andress – Honey Ryder
From Russia With Love…Daniela Bianchi – Tatiana Romanova
Goldfinger…Honor Blackman – Pussy Galore
Thunderball…Claudine Auger – Domino
You Only Live Twice…Akiko Wakabayashi – Aki
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service…Diana Rigg – Tracy Vicenzo
Diamonds Are Forever…Jill St. John – Tiffany Case
Live And Let Die…Jane Seymour – Solitaire
The Man With The Golden Gun…Britt Ekland –
..Mary Goodnight (never dated a Mary Goodnight…drat)
The Spy Who Loved Me…Barbara Bach – Anya Amasova
Moonraker…Lois Chiles – Dr. Holly Goodhead
For Your Eyes Only…Carole Bouquet – Melina Havelock
Octopussy…Maud Adams – Octopussy
A View To A Kill…Tanya Roberts – Stacey Sutton
The Living Daylights…Maryam D’Abo – Kara Milvoy
Licence To Kill…Carey Lowell – Pam Bouvier
GoldenEye…Izabell Scorupco – Natalya Simonova
Tomorrow Never Dies…Michelle Yeoh – Wai Lin
The World Is Not Enough…Denise Richards – Christmas Jones
.. (“Merrr-ry Christmas to me,” said Santa to his elves)
Die Another Day…Halle Berry – Jinx
–Steroids, Part XXXV: Lawyers for the Major League Baseball
Players Association have succeeded in persuading justice
department officials in San Francisco “to winnow (their) request
for results of baseball’s steroids tests last year from all 1,438
players to fewer than 15.” [Murray Chass / New York Times]
Well this sucks, but at least Barry Bonds, Gary Sheffield and
Jason Giambi are among the selected tests that will be reviewed.
Dave Anderson of the Times commented on the position of MLB
and the union, saying both seem to be “more protective of those
players who use steroids than those who didn’t…more concerned
with allowing users to continue using steroids than with those
with the integrity not to cheat.”
I was going through the Web the other day, looking for the 1998
piece by AP reporter Steve Wilstein that first exposed Mark
McGwire’s use of androstenedione, and instead found an article
written a week after, 8/28/98, by the AP concerning the
discovery that Colorado Rockies’ outfielder Dante Bichette was
also using andro. Only in this instance, Denver Post reporter
Mark Kiszla got into trouble because he had taken the bottle out
of Bichette’s locker to examine it. While most agreed it was a
legitimate story, Kiszla had his credentials as a baseball writer
revoked because of his methods. What it did confirm, though,
was that a lot of players back then were using steroids /
supplements that were banned by the NFL, IOC and NCAA at
the time, but not by baseball.
In another article from 8/98, R.E. Graswich of the Sacramento
Bee wrote of the properties of a substance liberally used by
many major league players, including McGwire, that being
creatine. Coupled with andro, “They plainly have enhanced his
ability to knock baseballs over fences…and (when he hits #62)
his record will be – must be – tainted…” adding, “These aren’t
idle placebos, harmless powders and pills that pack a punch from
the power of suggestion. Creatine has long been appreciated for
its ability to help launch an athlete’s first burst of activity – firing
out of a three-point stance to block a linebacker, heaving a
javelin, swinging a bat.”
So it’s not as if today’s discussion is anything new.
–Word out of Tokyo has it that Godzilla will soon be starring in
its last movie, which means that citizens of this city can finally
relax. I also realized that Godzilla’s scream bears a strong
resemblance to Howard Dean’s.
–Uh oh……dozens of mummies more than 500 years old have
been discovered by archaeologists in Peru. They should have left
them alone. You know what they say…never disturb a mummy.
–Hey Allen Iverson, nice shooting the other night…2 for 21
from the field against the Knicks. Overall, Iverson is shooting
39% from the field this year, just 29% from 3-point land. O-ver-
ra-ted!
–Former New Jersey Nets star Jayson Williams doesn’t stand a
chance in his manslaughter trial. Former teammate Benoit
Benjamin gave the most damning testimony the past week,
saying he saw Williams “pull the trigger,” while others have
described in great detail the cover-up.
–Former St. John’s player Abe Keita claims he received $300 a
month cash from a university official during the Mike Jarvis era.
Keita was one of those suspended from the university as a result
of his role in the Pittsburgh sex scandal. He has passed two
polygraph tests and is also filing a civil rights case against the
school. But I’m sure Jarvis will forever have his defenders.
–Since I mentioned UConn’s Emeka Okafor the other day for
being a good guy, it only seems right to note that after writing
that he was named a 1st-team Academic All-American for a
second consecutive year. Unfortunately, he has a bum back and
UConn’s chances in the NCAA tournament are severely
impacted because of this.
–Update: A few weeks ago I noted the federal investigation
currently looking into the boxing business, focusing on
promoters like Bob Arum. Thus far, investigators haven’t found
any evidence that any championship fights were fixed, but what
is readily apparent is there are potentially thousands of fraudulent
mismatches. As one law enforcement official told Greg
Krikorian of the Los Angeles Times, “Fixing fights is almost not
worth it. It’s high risk. Why do that when 90% of the time, you
can get the results you want by mismatching fighters?” Simply
put, records are manufactured, including in a lot of the televised
bouts you see.
–It’s tornado season, sports fans. On average, April sees 153 in
the U.S., May, 283, and June, 221. [Source: The Weather
Channel]
–The New York Rangers, who will fail to make the playoffs for
a 7th straight season, got rid of their best player in franchise
history, Brian Leetch. Not that I care that much, seeing as I
haven’t been to a Rangers game in about 20 years (when I had
season tickets), but it was a bush move. Leetch is a two-time
Norris Trophy winner for best defenseman, is 7th all-time in
scoring at his position, and was the MVP of the Rangers’ 1994
Stanley Cup victory. So what does he do with his new team, the
Toronto Maple Leafs? Try 3 assists his first game. Some
players you hold onto, regardless of how well the overall team is
doing. This classy guy should have retired a Ranger….but
nooooo. General Manager Glen Sather stays instead.
–So last year Matt Kenseth was NASCAR’s then Winston Cup
champion despite winning only one race. Kenseth was a bit
defensive about it all, when many complained the point system
needed to be fixed. Well, all he’s done this year is go out and
win 2 of the first 3 events. You have to respect that.
–There was a huge drug bust at the ‘Sound Factory’ nightclub in
New York City early Sunday morning. This place on W. 46th
Street was, in the eyes of one detective, a “suicide factory.”
Incredibly, 3,000-6,000 would cram their way into this joint
(paying $50 per head!) on Saturdays and a lengthy undercover
operation determined that 70% of the people there were high. At
least two partygoers dropped dead in the past year, while other
victims that overdosed were thrown into the back alley to
recover. This is sick, folks. I only mention the tale because
parents need to know where their kids are going.
–Ughh…awful loss for Wake Forest to N.C. State on Saturday.
Your editor is getting very nervous about the NCAA tournament,
fearing a first round defeat at the hands of East Tennessee State;
a #5 vs. #12 possible match-up.
Top 3 for the week of 3/6/76: #1 “Love Machine (Part I)” (The
Miracles) #2 “All By Myself” (Eric Carmen) #3 “December,
1963 (Oh, What A Night)” (The Four Seasons)
Baseball Quiz Answers: 1) Stan Musial, 177 (1941-63) and
Roberto Clemente, 166 (1955-72) are the only two to have 150
or more triples while finishing their careers post-1960. Sam
Crawford is the all-time leader with 312 (1899-1917), a record
that will obviously never be broken. Ty Cobb had 298. 2)
Career leaders, doubles: Tris Speaker, 792; Pete Rose, 746; Stan
Musial, 725; Ty Cobb, 724; George Brett, 665. 3) Rafael
Palmeiro is the active leader in doubles with 543. Barry Bonds
has 536, Craig Biggio, 517.
Next Bar Chat, Thursday….from D.C.
