Oakland A’s Quiz (1968-present): 1) RBI, season? [137] 2)
Batting average, season? [.342] 3) Wins, season? 4) Two
hurlers with four, 20-win seasons?
Atlanta Braves Quiz (1966-present): 1) Hits, season? [219] 2)
Hitting streak? [31] 3) Before Bobby Cox took over in the midst
of the 1990 season, who was the manager?
Answers below.
—
Tiger Takes British!
Professional Major Titles
Jack….18
Tiger…11
You may not like Tiger Woods, but the sport would probably
have 50% fewer people watching its big events if he wasn’t
participating and most real fans like the greats to be just that,
great. Tiger also won over some new fans with his continuing
dedication to his late father, Earl. It’s his most powerful
message.
And hats off to Chris DiMarco for another gutty performance,
this time while dealing with his own family tragedy, the sudden
death of his mother just two weeks ago.
—
A-Rod
It’s really amazing. On Friday, Alex Rodriguez clubbed his
450th home run with his 2,000th hit, thus becoming the eighth to
accumulate 2,000 hits before his 31st birthday (he turns 31 this
week), as well as the youngest to reach 450. Yet this has been
one interesting, painful season for this incredibly disingenuous
superstar. And of course it all starts, and ends, with his $252
million, 10-year contract. Now there are more than a few who
doubt A-Rod will complete his deal as a Yankee with his
contract set to expire after the 2010 season. Yankee fans are
doing all they can to run him out of town.
Why? It starts with the money and the fact he hasn’t led the
Yankees to any titles. He hasn’t led anyone to anything in his
career, for that matter. He’s racking up the stats, but he’s
perceived to be a loser. A-Rod then compounds it all by being
both a jerk and one of the more calculating guys on the planet.
This past week was particularly difficult for him as he made five
throwing errors in five games, and then when manager Joe Torre
chose to DH him on Saturday vs. Toronto, A-Rod struck out four
times in a row for the first time since 1995. He’s been booed like
no other New York athlete, perhaps ever, and yet he’s the
reigning league MVP and is still on track to hit 35-40 home runs
and drive in 125.
But here’s a typical A-Rod story that is also part of being a
superstar in New York. As reported by Jay Greenberg of the
New York Post:
“Brilliant, Alex Rodriguez described his Sunday (7/16), when he
started a difficult double play to get Jaret Wright out of a first-
inning jam, made another throw that forced a rundown and hit a
two-run homer that chased away his boo birds.
“Then, just like the well-heeled idiots in the beer commercial,
Rodriguez’ next bright idea was to sun himself on a blistering
Monday in Central Park, winding up not only shirtless in
yesterday’s Post, but with three throwing errors and a bases-
loaded seventh-inning strikeout (that evening).
“ ‘I only laid out for 10 minutes with my daughter and my wife –
wish it could have been longer,’ said Rodriguez yesterday…
“ ‘Can’t be hot enough [for him],’ he said.
“ ‘It’s Central Park. [Photographers] are out there every day.
It’s my back yard, what are you going to do?’”
“Go to his private club would be one suggestion. We mean the
one with the pool, not with poker tables or a writer with a tape
recorder running while Rodriguez tells the world how much
harder it is to be A-Rod than it is to be Derek Jeter….
“The Yankees pay Rodriguez $25 million a year to come to the
park prepared as possible, including on nights hot enough for the
trainers to post reminders about hydration, diet and ‘limiting
workouts.’ Whatever additional heat tolerance a guy from
Miami can claim, he still leaves the Yankees tolerating needless
supposition that their underachieving superstar played a game
fried.”
Selena Roberts / New York Times:
“It is impossible to catch Alex Rodriguez on film in an
unflattering position.
“Hit or big miss, his perfectly fluid swing isn’t capable of a slap
single. Three errors or not, his oiled wrist motion puts a cursive
loop on his throws.
“And on Monday, with the sun turning the city into a sweat stain,
there was the shirtless A-Rod, perfectly coifed, leaning back on a
rock in Central Park, flaunting pecs and abs as if awaiting an
Abercrombie & Fitch talent scout. But this wasn’t a photo shoot,
he promised. Just an innocent moment in the park, captured by
the ever-prowling paparazzi and slapped on the back page of The
New York Post yesterday.
“ ‘I thought I looked good in the modeling picture,’ Rodriguez
joked before adding, ‘No, just laying out with my daughter and
wife.’
“Sounds reasonable enough. But why does it always seem as if
A-Rod is posing. As if all sound bites are orchestrated, as if all
photo-ops are a manipulation? ….
“Is he a victim of fame or an accessory to the scrutiny? Whatever
the debate, A-Rod is polarizing to the point of distraction to his
team.
“The result is A-Rod fatigue for the Good Ship Pinstripes. The
Yankees are the ones left to answer for his slumps, errors and
snickers about his polished persona….
“At some point, Rodriguez must understand that his noble cause
to scrub the image of baseball with his own sparkling greatness
looks calculated. Whoever his advisers (or sycophants) are, they
have steered him wrong.”
His teammates despise him. For example, it’s been fascinating
to watch Captain Derek Jeter, perhaps the best baseball player
I’ve seen the more I think about it (not really remembering
Willie Mays in his prime), refuse to stick up for A-Rod. “He can
speak for himself,” is Jeter’s basic response.
The other day an A-Rod throwing error led to a Toronto rally
that K.O.’ed pitcher Mike Mussina as the Yankees went on to
lose the contest. Normally a pitcher/teammate would say
something like the following.
“Hey, that’s part of baseball. Look how many games A-Rod has
won for us this year, blah blah blah.”
Instead Mussina questioned why Rodriguez was throwing home
instead of taking the sure out at first. This kind of stuff just
doesn’t happen in Joe Torre’s clubhouse.
If the Yankees don’t win the Series this year, A-Rod is gone, but
because other teams will have learned enough about the guy, the
Yankees are going to have to eat a lot of the contract if they want
to move him. At least that’s my opinion.
Bonds Not Indicted
Jeff B. and I were distressed, big time, upon learning Barry
Dirtball wasn’t indicted the other day. At first, though, I tried to
comfort him. “Don’t worry, Jeff. Maybe they’re building a
death penalty case?”
But now I’m beginning to wonder myself if we’ll ever see
justice. Trainer Greg Anderson was released from prison a
second time and was immediately subpoenaed to appear before a
new grand jury and U.S. Attorney Kevin Ryan insists he will
continue to put pressure on Anderson to testify against Bonds,
but Anderson has yet to back down it would appear.
Sources say, though, that the new grand jury that is to impaneled
on Thursday will have several targets to look at, Bonds just being
one of them, and that athletes from the NFL as well as the
Olympics are among them. [Track coach Trevor Graham is said
to be under the gun; having trained Marion Jones, Tim
Montgomery and C.J. Hunter, aside from currently being sprinter
Justin Gatlin’s mentor.]
As New York Daily News sportswriter Mike Lupica notes,
however, “Baseball lost…because the longer the government
takes to make a real case against Bonds, the more people actually
will start to think he is some kind of victim here, a victim instead
of the drug cheat he is alleged to be. The way things are going,
Bonds will pass the great Henry Aaron in the record books
before the feds somehow manage to throw the book at him.”
Mike Vaccaro of the New York Post reaches the kind of
conclusion Lupica and myself are worried about.
“Maybe Bonds truly is guilty of perjury, of tax evasion, of using
truckloads of illegal steroids. I happen to think he is. There are
millions of people who think the same way. You know what? I
thought O.J. was guilty too. A jury thought otherwise. I thought
the two alleged Mafia cops got what was coming to them when
they were convicted and sent away. A judge felt differently.
This is the way justice is meted out in this country. Just because
a guy is contemptible enough that you want the book thrown at
him, it doesn’t mean the book will hit him in the head. Even a
grossly overgrown head.”
But then on Saturday came word the feds have possession of
Bonds’s medical records. As Jesse Jackson said:
KEEP HOPE ALIVE…KEEP HOPE ALIVE!!!!!
[One final note on this overall topic. Jack Curry has a piece in
The New York Times concerning a poll of 50 writers who will
be eligible to vote for the Hall of Fame this coming December,
and with Mark McGwire on the ballot, along with Tony Gwynn
and Cal Ripken Jr., 26 of the 50 said they would not vote for
McGwire, while only 8 said they would. The other 16 were still
undecided. 75% is required for induction.]
Miss Universe! Live from Los Angeles!
Boy, almost missed this…and I know how much you count on
me to supply the Exclusive Bar Chat recap.
For starters, though, I was upset with the opening. They brought
out the girls in their native costumes and of the 86 nations
represented, you could see the face on about 40 of them. And
some of their bodies were all covered up. Whassup with dat?
There is so much pressure on yours truly to come up with an
initial 20, but I went with:
Argentina, Australia, Belgium, Canada, Costa Rica, Croatia,
Egypt, Finland, Ghana, Ireland, Japan, Lebanon, Malaysia,
Nicaragua, Paraguay, Puerto Rico, Switzerland, Ukraine, U.K.,
USA
[I just have to note that China looked like she had snakes coming
out of her head, while I was very disappointed with Slovenia and
Brazil.]
And for the sake of the pageant, I have to pick my top three.
1) Switzerland 2) Japan 3) Canada
The judges then picked their top twenty.
Argentina! Bolivia, Brazil, Canada! Colombia, Denmark,
Ethiopia, Hungary, India, Japan! Mexico, Paraguay! Puerto Rico!
Russia, Sweden, Switzerland! Thailand, Trinidad & Tobago,
Ukraine! USA!
For crying out loud, Egypt and U.K. were robbed, I tell ya. If
I’m Hosni Mubarak, I ask the U.S. to give me $3 billion a year,
not the $2 billion he currently receives. As for the U.K., well,
Tony Blair is leaving soon so I guess it really doesn’t matter.
So I have 8 left. [Argentina, Canada, Japan, Paraguay, Puerto
Rico, Switzerland, Ukraine, USA]
Time for the swimsuits!
Oh nooooooo…..Switzerland is all bones! [Well, not quite, but I
don’t want to lose my International Web Site Association
license.] Canada, Japan, USA, and Argentina, though, are
looking strong.
Top Ten time……judges say…………..
Bolivia, Canada! Colombia, Japan! Mexico, Paraguay! Puerto
Rico! Switzerland! Trinidad & Tobago, USA!
Goodness gracious, sports fans…I have six of my original 20 in
the final ten!!!!!! And my top three! What are the odds?!
I’m thinking of ditching the site and becoming a professional
pageant judge.
“Formerly lead writer of the Pulitzer-prize winning Bar Chat
column… put your hands together for… Mister Editor!”
Arghhhhhhhhhhh!
Oh well….on to evening gowns….but first…..
Japan wants to be a UN ambassador some day, incidentally.
PEACE BREAKS OUT! SOUTH KOREA AND JAPAN LINK
ARMS! KIM JONG IL TAKES OVER FOR MATT LAUER
ON THE TODAY SHOW!
And now a word about our co-host Carlos Ponce. Geezuz, he’s
irritating. The incredibly overexposed Nancy O’Dell is Carlos’
partner. She’s wearing a goofy gown.
In the booth we have Shandi Fennessey and Carson Kressley.
After two minutes of these two, the gay, “crossing over to the
other side” stuff grows a bit old. Shandi’s cute, though.
Time for a commercial for Sweep ‘n Mop. Cleans any mess!
We’re back……I’m getting sleepy….
Final Five…..
Japan! Paraguay! Puerto Rico! Switzerland! USA!
Folks, I can’t make this up. I picked all five!
But then Switzerland messed up her initial question, Japan went
a bit overboard, and USA said “Lake Tahoe is the most
interesting place I’ve been to.” Lake Tahoe?! Yikes. America
is doomed.
Then in round two, Japan talked of a world where men didn’t
exploit women. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Actually,
Switzerland could yet pull it off. She’s genuine…and is trying
hard with her English, while Paraguay is clearly gaining
confidence as the evening wears on. She may take over her
country when she returns….a little coup action, perhaps, since
we’re all learning these days that democracy isn’t necessarily the
answer…..see Hamas and Hizbullah.
Only two of the five spoke English, by the way. Will this
matter?
And now….the moment you’ve been waiting for….
4th runner-up and winner of a $25 McDonald’s gift certificate…
USA!
3rd runner-up and winner of a subscription to Sports Illustrated…
Paraguay!
2nd runner-up and winner of a Swiss watch…
Switzerland
1st runner-up and winner of a trip to Lake Tahoe………
Japan
Which means Miss Universe is…………..
PUERTO RICO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hope you all had a good time….see you next year!
[Puerto Rico collapsed later, but she”s OK.]
Stuff
–You know, when I heard the story of the passing of Harry
Olivieri the other day I almost couldn’t believe it. I know he was
90 and all but I had to read more than one obituary before I was
convinced this was truly the creator of the Philly Cheesesteak.
Brothers Pat and Harry Olivieri, as the story goes, had a hot dog
stand in South Philadelphia during the Depression. Claire
Noland of the Los Angeles Times picks up the story.
“One day in 1933, Pat sent his younger brother Harry to the
nearby Italian market to buy some steak, because they were tired
of eating hot dogs for lunch. They chopped the steak and grilled
it with some onions, then slapped the concoction on a hot dog
bun.
“One of their regular customers, a cabdriver, happened by and
insisted on having one of the steak sandwiches, undeterred by the
brothers’ protests that this was their lunch. The cabby loved it,
and the Olivieris decided to switch from hot dogs to steak
sandwiches.
“The cheese didn’t come until later, when a cook added
provolone in the 1950s. Cheez Whiz was added to the menu in
the 1960s, and Philadelphia natives seem to prefer the processed
orange cheese version.”
Well, these days, Pat’s King of Steaks is still going strong, 24
hours a day, 362 days a year (all except Thanksgiving, Christmas
and Easter). There are all manner of celebrity photos of those
who have made a pilgrimage here and there is a plaque for the
exact spot where Sylvester Stallone, as Rocky Balboa, stood and
ate a Pat’s cheesesteak. [Passyunk Ave., by the way.] Pat
Olivieri died in 1970 and today the business is run by Harry’s
son, Frank, and his son, Frank Jr. Frank once said, “People come
to Philadelphia to go to Pat’s and see the Liberty Bell…in that
order.”
–We note the passing of actor Jack Warden, 85. It’s hard to
believe he won an Emmy for his portrayal of Bears coach George
Halas in “Brian’s Song” all the way back in 1971, as well as his
star turns in films like “Shampoo.”
Warden is another in that rapidly dying breed, World War II
vets; yes, “The Greatest Generation” ….always will be to me.
But in Warden’s case his life changed when he broke a leg
during a nighttime practice jump before D-Day, and when
convalescing back in the States picked up the acting bug; though
he still participated in the Battle of the Bulge.
And some of you know Warden was a boxer as a youth growing
up in Newark, N.J. Supposedly he once fought on the same card
at Madison Square Garden as another future actor, Charles
During.
–Sports Illustrated’s Steve Rushin commented on the head-
butting incident involving Italy’s Marco Materazzi and France’s
Zinedine Zidane, specifically, the alleged insult hurled by
Materazzi involving a derivation of ‘your mama.’
“The point is to provoke a reaction, and by history’s standard,
Materzaai was lucky to escape with Zidane’s head in his chest.
Because John the Baptist had insulted ‘her’ mother, Salome
received his head on a platter.
“Still, ‘your mama’ has had its most lasting effect in sports,
where athletes and fans have been insulting her since the
beginning of time. In 1912 Ty Cobb climbed into the stands in
New York after a handicapped man named Claude Lueker
allegedly slandered Amanda Cobb. Cobb promptly pummeled
Lueker, adding injury to insult.
“To protest his ensuing suspension, Cobb’s teammates staged a
one-day walkout, during which the Tigers fielded replacement
players. The substitutes lost 24-2 to the Philadelphia A’s, setting
records for single-game futility, including the 26-hit complete
game thrown by Allan Travers, who went on to become a
Catholic priest, a rare marriage of ‘Our Father’ and ‘your mama.’
“In the century that followed, ‘your mama’ lost some of her
shock value. ‘Son of a bitch,’ for instance, is now often used as a
term of endearment. Hines Ward once popped up smiling after a
vicious hit from defensive back Rodney Harrison, who told the
Steelers receiver, ‘You’re one tough son of a bitch.’ Ward never
forgot the praise.
“Nearly three decades ago Darryl Dawkins named one of his
dunks Yo Mama – dunking on a defender being the physical
manifestation of that playground insult. Today, ‘yo mama’ is so
benign a dis that it’s the name of an insult-competition show on
MTV.”
–The other day the Oneonta Tigers defeated the Brooklyn
Cyclones 6-1 in 26 innings in a game that took 6 hours 40
minutes. The record is 33 innings; a contest between Triple-A
Pawtucket and Rochester in 1981.
–Business Week had a story on bats. The issue is do you panic
if you see one in your house, for example, and just go ahead with
the rabies prevention treatments which are painful, both
physically and monetarily (like $1,500 for the full run), even if
there is no visible evidence you were bitten.
The facts are only 0.5% of all bats have rabies, but 5% of bats
found in homes may have them. Most worrisome, 50% of people
with bat rabies can’t document a bat bite. And only one person
in the United States is known to have survived the disease.
Yikes.
–Boy, the ongoing drought in Australia is creating some awful
problems. Packs of wild dogs have been attacking farmers.
“The dogs, offspring of escaped farm or hunting dogs, are
encroaching on inhabited areas as they follow their prey –
kangaroos – to the shrinking band of irrigated farmland.” [The
Times (of London)]
The dogs have become such a danger authorities have had to
protect miners, as well as farmers, from the packs.
–Do you like peanut butter? Check this out. Saratoga Peanut
Butter, Saratoga Springs, NY, has flavored peanut butters that
you can purchase online at saratogapeanutbutterco.com.
I just ordered some…Vermont Maple and Blizzard Butter (white
chocolate). I’ll let you know just how tasty it is.
–Uh oh. It seems that Winkie, a female Asian elephant at The
Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee, killed a handler and injured a
trainer the other day. Winkie weighs 7,600 pounds and hails
from Burma.
It would seem Winkie hasn’t adjusted well to her time in the
States, even though it’s been 30 years. And so according to the
wire services, “(She) stepped on or kicked a woman handler who
was killed ‘on the spot’….A male trainer was injured when he
tried to intervene.”
Previously, Winkie had hurt a number of staffers at a zoo in
Madison, Wis.
Frankly, I’m glad I survived my recent trip to Tennessee. I mean
I don’t know how I would have reacted had Winkie suddenly
appeared at Shiloh battlefield, know what I’m sayin’?
–According to experts in Finland, global warming is having
quite an effect on reindeer and salmon. Because the winters are
shorter and temps slightly higher, there is more food to eat for
both and they are growing stronger and larger. A 300-pound
salmon would be a scary thought. And good thing Winkie
doesn’t live in Finland.
–Parade Magazine has “Lifesaving Tips” on “How to Avoid
Sharks.”
No. 3) “Avoid schools of fish, seals and fishing bait or catches.”
Especially unaccredited schools. As for seals, I try to avoid them
wherever I go. They’re unruly, they smell, and are perhaps the
most overrated animal ever created by God. [Hippos are the
most overrated danger, just to make the distinction clear between
the two.]
No. 7) “If you do spot a shark, watch it and exit the water
smoothly. Splashing makes you look like an injured fish.”
Oh yeah, I’d swim smoothly and in a dignified fashion,
recognizing I am representing humankind, as those on the beach
taking in the scene are also looking to me as a role model.
–How to avoid Winkie…….. “Stay out of Tennessee.”
–From the Anchorage Daily News:
“Grizzlies on rivers put managers on edge”
As anglers fish the Kenai and Russian rivers, game officials are
increasingly worried about the number of bears that use the area
as their playground, too. Human-bear encounters are on the
increase.
“We’re sitting on a time bomb here,” said Dianne Owens,
manager of the Russian River ferry.
We can only hope, mused your editor. Actually, we’ll offer
$1,000 to any bear for their best human encounter story. The
only requirement is that it be legible.
–Nancy Lopez on Michelle Wie: “I would like to talk to (Wie).
But she is not approachable to me….I don’t feel like I can go up
to her and ask, ‘What’s your goal? Why don’t you just play on
our tour and beat the great players on the women’s tour? Do you
ever want to win?’” [GolfWeek]
Relax, Nancy. The kid is still just 16, for crying out loud.
–Yessir, we have us another “Jerk of the Year” candidate in
former Toronto Blue Jay Shea Hillenbrand, who was cut (and
later traded) after he refused to sit in the dugout with his
teammates. From ESPN.com:
“Hours before, Hillenbrand criticized the organization and said
he expected to be traded. (Hillenbrand) was upset because he
wasn’t in the starting lineup for the second consecutive game and
nobody in Toronto’s front office congratulated him on adopting a
baby girl last weekend.”
It should be noted that Hillenbrand left his teammates a week ago
Friday to be with his family for the adoption and didn’t return
until Tuesday.
Old-time baseball fans remember when players were given zero
time off for births and such. Hey, it goes with the territory. The
guy missed at least three games for an adoption?! Do it in the
off-season. And to paraphrase Scrooge, “I assume, Shea, you
expect to be paid for this time off, too!”
–Duke’s starting quarterback, sophomore Zack Asack, was
suspended for plagiarism. He is eligible to come back in 2007.
No details were provided but I hope he wasn’t plagiarizing some
of the animal stories in this column.
–Allen H. wrote in to question whether Marlon Brisco was really
the first black quarterback in the NFL, citing Willie Thrower
who participated in one game for the Chicago Bears in 1953.
[He was 3 of 8 passing.] But I was focusing on ‘starting’ QBs
and I can’t tell if Thrower started his one game. If anyone
knows, drop me a line.
Anyway, it turns out that Allen had an interest in this issue
because his mother went to high school with Willie Thrower in
New Kensington, Pa.
–Back to the British Open, as Mark R. writes in, what’s up with
the incredibly ugly golf shirts this year? I couldn’t agree more,
especially that piece of crap Jim Furyk was wearing on Sunday.
He looked like he had on suspenders (Furyk’s are button
downs to the belt line, in case you haven’t seen them, and he had
these two stupid stripes running down the front on Sunday).
Those zipper shirts are also stupid. You’ll never catch me
wearing one of them on the course, that’s for sure.
And on a different topic, Mark also notes that Tour de France
winner Floyd Landis hails from near Lancaster, Pa.,
(Farmersville), his parents being Mennonites and all.
Yes, Landis is a helluva story with his arthritis and his pending
hip replacement. It also seemed like one day we heard he had
dropped far off the pace and the next he was suddenly back in it;
truly one of the great comebacks in the event.
–Did you see Phil Mickelson being interviewed after his fourth
round at Royal Liverpool on Sunday? Didn’t it look like he’d
aged five years since the U.S. Open?
–Nick Faldo: “Orange is this year’s green.”
–Congratulations to a college classmate of mine, golfer Gary
Hallberg. The first four-time All-American and NCAA
champion when he was at Wake Forest, Hallberg won three
times on the PGA Tour but was a huge disappointment for a
variety of reasons.
But this weekend at the PGA event in upstate New York, the 48-
year-old Hallberg got a sponsor’s exemption, made the cut, and
finished tied for 24th.
We don’t know each other but I do remember him my freshman
year, sitting in a calculus class for all of two or three days before
he dropped it. I stayed on to get a gentleman ‘C’. [I then took
Calc II and got a distinguished….well, perhaps I shouldn’t go
there.]
–Back to steroids, the New York Post’s Joel Sherman brings up
an interesting point. While all the focus has been on Barry
Bonds and Major League Baseball’s problems, last week Dr.
James Shortt (sic) was sentenced to a year and a day in jail after
pleading guilty to a federal count of conspiracy to distribute
steroids and HGH to NFL players. Prosecutors identified seven
former Carolina Panthers, most associated with the 2003-04 NFC
champions, as receiving illegal performance enhancers from
Shortt. During the sentencing hearing, a U.S. attorney
introduced the fact that the Panthers’ players considered the NFL
steroid testing program “almost a complete joke.”
But as Sherman writes:
“How is it that this was not major across-the-country news?
How, exactly, was Barry Bonds not being indicted a bigger story
than jail time for a doctor who tainted a Super Bowl? How come
there are no on-air moralists sermonizing about how the Panthers
must give that NFC title back? ….
“The answer is really simple: Major League Baseball is held to a
higher standard than the NFL – by the public, by the media and
by politicians.”
Sherman added it’s time for the reporters covering the NFL to
begin to do their job and start exposing the athletes the way
we’ve been gradually learning the truth in baseball.
–Uh oh. I know one reader who isn’t going to be happy with
this tail. As reported by Bernard Lagan in The Times:
“A cunning scheme to prevent groups of boy racers from
plaguing a residential area by blasting them with Barry Manilow
songs has met with a mixed response. The local council in
Rockdale, near Sydney, has hailed the plan as a success. The
residents, however, who are forced to endure the crooner’s
greatest hits from 9pm until midnight every Friday, Saturday and
Sunday, are less enthusiastic.
“Up to a hundred hooligans had been gathering in the streets of
the town and the council was concerned their roaring engines and
loud car stereos were giving its citizens sleepless nights and
damaging trade for local restaurants.”
But while the kids are leaving, the residents are increasingly
upset.
“I just can’t sleep when it’s on,” said one resident. “And to think
there is going to be another six months of this.”
The deputy mayor of Rockdale sympathizes.
“I am not disputing what the residents are saying. I myself can’t
swallow some of Manilow’s songs, like ‘Mandy.’”
According to reporter Lagan, “Research said to have been
conducted in the United States for the FBI in the early 1990s
suggested that the extended playing of Manilow’s songs could
force people to flee.”
The FBI was going to use the music before Janet Reno ended the
siege at Waco her way, incidentally.
As for Manilow, he told an Aussie magazine, “Frankly, I think if
you played anyone’s music for that long you’d drive any
rationally minded human out of their mind.”
He’s got a point. Anything by Leo Sayer would probably do the
trick, too. I’m just wondering why we don’t try this with bin
Laden.
Top 3 songs for the week of 7/29/72: #1 “Alone Again
(Naturally)” (Gilbert O’Sullivan…perhaps the most depressing
song of all time) #2 “Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl)” (Looking
Glass) #3 “Too Late To Turn Back Now” (Cornelius Brothers &
Sister Rose)…and…#4 “(If Loving You Is Wrong) I Don’t Want
To Be Right” (Luther Ingram) #5 “Daddy Don’t You Walk So
Fast” (Wayne Newton…yeah, him!) #6 “Where Is The Love”
(Roberta Flack & Donny Hathaway…timeless) #7 “School’s
Out” (Alice Cooper…holding up well, don’t you think?)
Oakland A’s Quiz Answers: 1) RBI, season: Jason Giambi, 137
(2000…Giambi on the juice). 2) Batting average, season: Jason
Giambi, .342 (2001…Giambi on the juice). 3) Wins, season:
Bob Welch, 27 (1990) 4) Two to win 20, four seasons: Catfish
Hunter and Dave Stewart.
*Here’s something interesting. When the A’s had their awesome
streak, 1971-74, winning the Series 1972-74, they drew only
between 914,000 and 1,000,000 each of those four seasons. It’s
pretty amazing they stayed in Oakland when you think about it.
Attendance in more recent years has been strong, 2mm+
consistently.
Atlanta Braves Quiz Answers: 1) Hits, season: Ralph Garr, 219
(1971…seems like yesterday…just bummed myself out). 2)
Hitting streak: Rico Carty, 31 (1970). 3) Russ Nixon was the
manager before Bobby Cox took over during the 1990 season.
1990…Braves go 65-97…draw 980,000
1991…94-68…draw 2,100,000
Braves finish first every year since and draw over 2.1 mm, with
the exception of 1994, the strike season.
But it’s the Metsies this year!
Next Bar Chat, Thursday.
