Baseball Quiz: Name the Top Ten in RBI, lifetime. [Only one
hint on this one. #10 retired in 1897.] Answer below.
Ewa Wisnierska
What an amazing story. The world championships in paragliding
are taking place in Australia in about a month so Polish-German
Ewa Wisnierska decides she is going to get in some early
practice at the site, along with a Chinese competitor. But
officials urge both to skip it because there is a fierce storm
moving in. The two go out anyway. The wicked storm hits and
the Chinese fellow is killed.
But Ewa is taken on the ride of a lifetime…so to speak. The
storm takes her up…and up…and up…so high that her
equipment registered 32,000 feet, the cruising altitude for most
airplanes, for crying out loud.
Ewa blacked out for 40 minutes though said later, “I could hear
lightning in front of me, behind me, around me. It was dark,
everything was frozen and I knew I could not do anything, just
hope and pray.”
When she came to she focused on getting out of the cloud and
amazingly was able to land safely where her crew found her still
caked in ice (and with some frostbite). Otherwise she’s fine and
will probably compete in the championships.
And so for this, we hereby put Ewa Wisnierska in the Bar Chat
Hall of Fame. Saaa-luuute!
[Note: Ewa is also eligible for “Idiot of the Year,” but just as in
bridge, Hall of Fame trumps Idiot.]
Stuff
–No doubt Ewa Wisnierska was one lucky lady. Then you have
the drunken Aussie who decided to head into the water and battle
a bronze whaler shark the other day. Now upon reading this, my
friend Brad K. said he was tempted to do the same and battle a
bear he’s seen near his property, but I’m advising Brad to just
take a deep breath and enjoy the Presidents Day holiday.
–We note the passing of 81-year-old Chief Illiniwek, the mascot
for the University of Illinois. The Chief was killed by American
Indian Groups and the NCAA, both of which have no sense of
humor.
–Did you see the story about the tire reefs gone bad off the coast
of Ft. Lauderdale and elsewhere? Years ago, in an effort to do
good, a gazillion tires were tied together and dumped in the
waters to create what was hoped would be a giant artificial reef.
Well it seems that not only didn’t fish take to the treads, now the
tires are breaking apart, and those that aren’t washing up on the
beach are instead dragging the bottom, tearing up the seabed and
corral.
Now whose dumb idea was this? Everyone knows that the first
thing a mother fish tells her kids (the 3 out of a 1,000 that survive
the first hour that is) “Don’t go near the tires! Only mosquitoes
like them! So what does that tell you, Charlie?” “I’m not
Charlie.”
–And now…more on Casablanca and Marrakech.
For starters, I can’t get the Crosby, Stills & Nash song
“Marrakech Express” out of my head. In all seriousness, it was
so bad Wednesday night I couldn’t get more than about a half
hour’s sleep.
But now having been there, at least I can vouch for lyrics like:
“Take the train from Casablanca going south” (my drive
paralleled the tracks) and “Charming cobras in the square.”
According to my driver/guide Ali, Marrakech was a key stop on
the caravan route between Timbuktu and Fes. Today it is a city
of 1.2 million and as I wrote in “Week in Review” it is a modern,
clean place undergoing a huge construction boom, all geared
towards tourism and more than a few Saudis, it would seem, who
like the idea of a second home there as opposed to their own 120-
degree summers. Marrakech is a bit more temperate.
Marrakech has 170,000 palm trees and Ali said it is a whopping
$500 fine to damage one.
There is a casino here, and lots of bars, which isn’t what you’d
expect out of most Muslim countries. Ali says drinking is OK,
as long as you don’t go to the mosque right after.
I saw a McDonald’s here and in hindsight I wish I had gone in to
check out the menu.
And when we spotted some camels, Ali asked me how much I
thought it would be to have one shipped to the United States?
Try $55,000. Now while this may seem like a lot, and risky, the
price includes the cost of a tender who then stays with it the
whole way. I forgot to ask if the guy then gets to return to
Morocco first class or in a cargo crate. Camels only need
feeding once a month and water every forty days. Personally, I’d
break down and have to find a six-pack someplace along the
way.
As for the famous square in Marrakech…the one with snake
charmers and guys with their monkeys…Ali shrewdly said, “Get
off here. I’ll wait for you across the way. Just remember, ignore
anyone coming up and asking you for things.”
So he basically shoved me out the door and I’m standing there
thinking, OK, here I am.
Well I sauntered over to a large crowd where a bunch of guys
had four cobras on the ground, all at attention, while one of the
men was trying to drape some black snakes over onlookers for a
picture, at which point you of course had to pay for this
‘privilege.’
I immediately walked away because I saw a German guy tell his
wife he had just been bitten! He was shaking his wrist and
looked to be in a little pain.
Not for me, mon. I checked out the fruit stalls instead, while
avoiding the gentlemen who kept trying to get me to let their big
monkeys sit on my shoulder. You’ve gotta be kiddin’ me, I
mused, as I shook my head ‘no.’ Those monkeys, which looked
like gibbons, could rip your face off!
But something pulled me back to the snake pit and sure enough,
I’m just standing there, among the crowd, when a guy pulls me
into the ring, slaps a snake around my neck, tells me “hold its
head, this way,” and I’m thinking, ‘great.’ He then grabs my
camera while another guy puts a second snake (another long,
nasty black one) around my neck. “Hold its head, this way.”
Yeah, yeah. I’m now holding two freakin’ snakes together.
Now I kid you not, the whole time the cobras are all of five feet
from me, staring at your editor like a bunch of school kids. I’m
assuming they were defanged, but it’s the spit that kills you!
To make a long story short, the guy snapped off two pictures and
if one comes out OK I’ll post it on Bar Chat…but I’m assuming I
look terrified, or very pissed off, at which point I will probably
exercise better judgment.
I also wasn’t happy when the first guy’s partner asked me for
200 dirham. That’s over $20! For two photos and the chance I’d
be bitten or strangled to death.
Now I’m really not happy and refused to pay, not having wanted
to partake in this in the first place. Then the first guy told his
partner 100 was enough which I forked over, at which point I
went off to find Ali. Turns out he had been observing me off to
the side and was pretty amused by it all.
So that is your example of “Charming cobras in the square.”
Just a few other thoughts on the long day to Marrakech. The
locals (peasants) sell broccoli and asparagus bunches along the
side of the road…just holding the clumps out like a hitchhiker.
Ali said much of it is grown wild in the forests. It actually
looked pretty good.
What didn’t look good were the phosphate mountains; phosphate
being a leading product for Morocco. I can think of few nastier
jobs in the world than working one of these, so I couldn’t help
but glance at the mountains and wonder just how bad it was for
those making $3 or $4 a day to be covered in dust.
You know what was a real pleasant surprise along the road,
however? The main rest stop about 1 ½ hours outside
Casablanca. [The trip to Marrakech is 3 ½ hours.]
I mean to tell you it was better than any on the Garden State
Parkway or New Jersey Turnpike. Surprisingly clean, with a big
restaurant area.
We stopped both ways, mainly so Ali could get his Espresso
because it is one tough drive. Trust me when I say this was no
ordinary Espresso, either. It perked us both up real good, and it
was all of about 20 cents.
That’s about it. Just wanted to give you a sense of the country.
But wait…you might be thinking. What about the women,
editor?
Why I thought you’d never ask. Actually, just as it is in other
Muslim nations I’ve been to, you don’t see any mini-skirts, but at
the same time very few are all covered in black. The younger
women wear tight outfits and it becomes most of them, if you
catch my drift. But that was all I was going to say on the
subject….until, that is, my outing to an authentic Moroccan
restaurant on Friday night.
Goodness gracious. The men had their harems out in force, and
the girls were dressed to kill, including some even in mini-skirts.
This was clearly an “in spot” for Casablanca and it was as cool a
place as I’ve ever been to. For starters, a 7-piece orchestra
played terrific traditional music…very hypnotic and conducive to
drinking Casablanca Premium Lager…and I must say it wasn’t a
bad thing when a belly-dancer plied her trade directly in my face.
But enough of that….cough cough.
I couldn’t understand the menu so I asked this French guy who
was leaving to tell me what he ordered. He pointed to some
dishes, which is what I then chose, and I’ll never know exactly
what I ate but it was out of this world.
And that’s it from Casablanca. I’m writing this part up Sat.
night, having gone back to a restaurant overlooking the Atlantic
for lunch. Now it’s downstairs to the world’s biggest hotel
lounge…at least that I’ve seen. Very comfortable chairs and
cold Casablanca Premium Lager. But just now Ali called, saying
“It would be a pleasure to take you to the airport, tomorrow.”
And he’s not even charging me much. Well, at least I made one
friend here.
—
–So I’m watching a little CNN International in my hotel room
and they are showing clips from the NBA All-Star Weekend,
including the contest between the league’s best sophomores and
rookies. The final score was 155-114, sophs, and it was evident
that there was zero defense attempted. Which begs the question,
what is the point? What is the point of the regular NBA All-Star
Game, where no defense is played?
What’s the point of the NHL All-Star Game, which normally
ends up like 14-12; making a mockery of that sport. And what’s
the point of the NFL Pro Bowl? Hell, it’s after the freakin’
season is over.
At least in baseball’s All-Star Game you get some defense and a
solid facsimile of the game played during the regular season.
And that’s a memo…..
–Rutgers football coach Greg Schiano is in fat city, that’s for
sure. The school just rewarded him with yet another extension,
to 2016, and upped his pay to $1.5 million per. I still can’t rant
and rave about this one. This program has turned the corner and
it is fantastic for the university, let alone the state. A badly
needed shot in the arm, especially considering we have the
world’s worst group of politicians. [Actually, New York State
has been giving us a run for our money. New Gov. Eliot Spitzer
is about to go totally off the deep end trying to deal with the
biggest group of a-holes since Bode Miller.]
–Yikes…saw a picture on the Web of Queen Latifah and Al
Gore at the Grammys. All the more reason to take my tape of
that event and record over it post-haste. Nothing against
Queenie, mind you, but that wasn’t the most flattering outfit.
–We await more exciting developments on the “For Better or
For Worse” scene. All we know now is that Michael not only
has a book contract, the advance for which hasn’t been cashed as
yet, as best as I can determine, but he also has to deal with Sandy
Weill look-a-like Mr. Gluttson, who in typical Weill fashion is
asking Mike to do his dirty work in firing a bunch of folks that it
would appear are Michael’s peers. But suddenly, Michael wants
to resign instead. Don’t do it! Get a woman to charge Gluttson
with harassment, which by the looks of the bastard he’s clearly
guilty of………conflict resolution, another free feature of Bar
Chat.
–I’m back in Paris for a day to see some museums before
heading home, and in catching up I see Mike Lupica of the New
York Daily News has trouble stomaching Tiki Barber as much as
I do as he commented over the weekend, “At what point did Tiki
Barber start thinking that he was operating on some higher
intellectual plane than the rest of us?” Spot on, Mr. Lupica. I’d
add Barack Obama often comes off the same way.
–Ha! No more Michael Irvin on ESPN’s NFL coverage. I guess
they finally realized that aside from Irvin’s many personal issues,
it’s probably best to have someone who can at least speak
English at a 6th grade level.
–I see where one of my favorite New York television reporters
passed away, Ralph Penza. Some guys are just good, and that
was Ralph.
–I guess Britney Spears was on JetBlue. How else to explain her
behavior?
–Vanderbilt shocked #1 Florida in NCAA basketball, 83-70.
Not for nothing but Wake Forest beat Vandy earlier in the season
by 10, so that makes Wake, now 13-13 after winning its 4th ACC
game, 23 better than Florida………really.
–Watch out, Cinderella followers. Winthrop is 23-4 and when
they sweep their conference tournament, I see the NCAA tourney
committee giving them no worse than a 7 seed. If on the other
hand they get a #10 or #11 seed, I pity that #6 or #7 that has to
face them.
–I tried to stay up and follow both the Nissan Open and Daytona
on Sunday night, but there is a six-hour time difference and
didn’t make it. But congratulations to Charles Howell III for
breaking through after a long drought. Suddenly the PGA season
is developing some good story lines, and it only makes the game
better if Howell is a consistent performer. Another likeable guy.
–Songwriter Ray Evans died, 92. Collaborating with partner Jay
Livingston, the two wrote some of the all-time greats, including
three Oscar winners… “Buttons And Bows,” “Mona Lisa,” and
“Whatever Will Be, Will Be (Que Sera, Sera).”
In addition, Evans and Livingston wrote a big seller for Andy
Williams, “Dear Heart,” as well as the 1951 Christmas classic,
“Silver Bells.” And they even wrote the theme music for
“Bonanza” and “Mr. Ed.”
I think I have more respect for songwriters than any other
occupation. Nothing like leaving the world a true classic. I only
hope some of the above will still be listened to 100 years from
now. At least we know “Silver Bells” will.
And you know what oldie is in my head now? “Girl Talk,” the
Tony Bennett version. And who wrote that one? Neil Hefti and
Robert Troup.
Top 3 songs for the week of 2/14/76: #1 “50 Ways To Leave
Your Lover” (Paul Simon) #2 “Love To Love You Baby”
(Donna Summer) #3 “You Sexy Thing” (Hot Chocolate)…and
…#4 “I Write The Songs” (Barry Manilow) #5 “Sing A Song”
(Earth, Wind & Fire) #6 “Love Rollercoaster” (Ohio Players…
yow!) #7 “Times Of Your Life” (Paul Anka…it doesn’t make
me a bad person that I like this song…does it?) #9 “Convoy”
(C.W. McCall) #10 “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do” (Neil Sedaka)
Baseball Quiz Answer: Top Ten RBI
1. Hank Aaron…2297
2. Babe Ruth…2213
3. Lou Gehrig…1995
4. Stan Musial…1951
5. Ty Cobb…1939
6. Barry Bonds…1930…Booo Boooooooooooooooo!!!!!
7. Jimmie Foxx…1921
8. Eddie Murray…1917
9. Willie Mays…1903
10. Cap Anson…1880
Actives
25. Ken Griffey Jr. …1608
33. Frank Thomas…1579
44. Manny Ramirez…1516
46. Gary Sheffield…1501
*I need to clean some stuff up when I get back home so the next
Bar Chat will not be until next Monday.
