NCAA Football Quiz: 1) Name the three quarterbacks for
Miami, 1987-91, when they won three national titles and posted
a 56-4 record. 2) What were TB Johnny Musso’s three seasons
at Alabama? 3) Who followed Joe Namath at QB at Alabama in
1965? [Give me one of two.] Answers below.
[Note: I am bound and determined to chronicle the worst
collapse in baseball history; plus it’s my team, after all. The
following will be part of the site I will build over time, maybe by
Nov. 1, utilizing a different Web address. I have taken down a
few just for this purpose.]
Mets ’07, Part II
Sept. 12…Mets 83-62……… lead Phillies by 7 games
Sept. 14…loss…Philly, home…2-3 (10)……up 5 ½
Sept. 15…loss…Philly, home…3-5…………up 4 ½
Sept. 16…loss…Philly, home…6-10………..up 3 ½
Sept. 17…loss…Washington, away…4-12….up 2 ½
Sept. 18…loss…Washington, away…8-9……up 1 ½
Sept. 19…win…Washington, away…8-4……up 2 ½
Sept. 20…loss….Florida, away…7-8………..up 1 ½
Sept. 21…win….Florida, away…9-6………..up 1 ½
Sept. 22…win….Florida, away…7-2………..up 1 ½
Sept. 23…win….Florida, away…7-6 (11)…..up 2 ½
Sept. 24…loss…Washington, home…4-13….up 2
Sept. 25…loss…Washington, home…9-10….up 2
Sept. 26…loss…Washington, home…6-9……up 1
Sept. 27…loss….St. Louis, home…0-3………tied
Sept. 28…loss….Florida, home….4-7………..down 1
Sept. 29…win….Florida, home…13-0……….tied
Sept. 30…loss….Florida, home…1-8…………down 1
Oct. 1……Mets final record 88-74…players clean out lockers.
Yes, I’m still upset, as any good Mets fans should be for years to
come. Yet, incredibly, from Omar Minaya to Willie Randolph to
the players, they still don’t get it as we continue to hear the same
BS as to how this 2007 edition did the best they could.
I’m also sick of some of the veteran New York sportswriters who
are defending their buddies, particularly Tom Glavine. I’ve lost
a lot of respect the past few days for the likes of Harvey Araton
and George Vecsey of the New York Times, for instance.
That said, the Mets probably made the right decision in retaining
Willie, but only if pitching coach Rick Peterson and Rickey
Henderson are canned.
The problem is, we are returning with largely the same team for
’08, I imagine, thanks to some horrible contracts. And I stick
with my thought of trading Jose Reyes. There is something very
wrong that obviously Willie couldn’t get control of this season.
But at least sportswriters Mike Vaccaro and Lisa Olson are on
the mark, along with some of the others that follow.
Mike Vaccaro / New York Post
“For two years, the Mets have acted like a team that had already
established a dynasty, already hung championship banners to the
flagpole in center field. For two years the organization has
seethed as the Yankees retained their foothold as the city’s
dominant team, wondering why it should take a silly little thing
like a championship or two to reshuffle the baseball deck.
“And for two years, thanks to that team-wide hubris, thanks to a
misplaced sense of entitlement, the Mets have grown far more
distant, far more detached from a fan base that wants so badly a
team it can embrace, yet found in this team one that couldn’t be
further away from their own personality. They tried to like an
unlikable team, love an unlovable team. And this is what they
got.
“Fans never want to believe the players who actually play the
games care less about those games than they do. They want to
hear stories about football players weeping after overtime losses,
shortstops curled up in the fetal position after elimination games.
They are always shocked when told about the dispassionate way
most professionals accept setbacks.
“But there has never been as vast a gap between fan angst and
team apathy as with these 2007 Mets. Ever. All season long, the
fans would loudly plead that the Mets were mailing games in,
that they lacked fire, that they were missing a critical sense of
urgency. All season long, fans frowned at the on-field antics of a
team that sure knew how to celebrate success far better than
maintaining it.
“Sometimes, they were dismissed as ‘typical Mets fans,’ the kind
who always keep an ear to the ground, waiting for the other
sneaker to drop. Only this time, it turns out, those fans were
really on to something. There really was a huge abscess where
this team’s soul should have been, a rotting and rotted core. Tom
Glavine summed that up perfectly Sunday, after his thanks-for-
stopping-by nine-batter, one-out cameo. Asked if he was
‘devastated,’ Glavine opted for the less-damning adjective
‘disappointed,’ then thought it necessary to lecture on all the
things in life that could truly be defined as ‘devastating.’
“And all that did was confirm that Glavine, like too many Mets,
doesn’t get it. You weren’t devastated? Maybe that explains
why the Braves won only one title in 14 years of National
League dominance. Even if you aren’t devastated – which is
incredible – you’d better say you are. You’d better throw the
fans a scrap.
“That underlines a culture that badly needs to be altered,
immediately, inside that clubhouse. Everyone will focus on the
collapse, but the fact is the Mets played one game under .500
from June 1 on. If the Phillies or Braves had righted themselves
sooner, the Mets would have been passed in July, and out of
things by August. This wasn’t some late-season problem. This
was a team-wide malady. And it needs to be fixed. Now.
“The Yankees don’t cry when they lose elimination games, don’t
rant and rave and beat themselves with their spikes. But
devastation always looms on their faces, in their hearts, in their
words. If it doesn’t, they are usually not long for The Bronx.
That, really, is all fans ask for. Maybe no athlete will ever care
as much, or as deeply, as fans do. Fan is short for ‘fanatic,’ after
all. But there had better never be as wide a gap, as deep a gulf,
as the one that existed between Mets players and Mets fans this
year. Not with these stakes. And not at these prices.”
Lisa Olson / New York Daily News
“The disconnect between the Mets organization and its fan base
is staggering. Pay attention to what ownership and management
don’t say. Watch the players’ ambivalent shrugs, listen to their
admissions of hubris and complacency.
“It wasn’t enough that fans felt as if their hearts had been ripped
out and stomped on Sunday, when the Mets season expired
suddenly and prematurely. No, the Mets had to squeeze lemons
into the wound yesterday by firing off an e-mail apologizing for
a collapse that was so colossal, so embarrassing and
unfathomable, it will be dissected for generations.
“The exact words – ‘All of us at the Mets are bitterly
disappointed in failing to achieve our collective goal of building
upon last year’s success’ – read as if they were spawned by
marketing types summoned to coin next year’s catchy slogan. If
this was the club’s attempt at recognizing the fans’ anger and
disgust, the Mets again failed miserably.
“Not once did anyone affiliated with the club acknowledge the
Mets had pulled off the greatest September choke job in the
history of baseball. As a few players dropped by Shea to collect
their belongings, as general manager Omar Minaya bobbed and
weaved and the owners hid in their bunkers, more than 8,000
readers logged their comments in a Daily News poll that asked,
‘Is this the worst day in Mets history?’
“An overwhelming 86% answered, ‘Yes,’ followed by rants
suggesting they won’t soon forgive or forget a season that ended
in such an ugly manner.
“Forget the fans’ investments of money and time, both of which
are substantial; (owners) Fred and Jeff Wilpon talk often of
creating a connection between the club and fans, an affair built
on community, charity and trust. That affair has been broken,
the trust destroyed, and the Wilpons need to explain how they
plan to repair it.”
[Lisa Olson, on GM Omar Minaya’s press conference, Monday.]
“ ‘This is really our first pennant race,’ Minaya said, spinning the
unspinnable. When he called the Mets’ over-the-top celebrations
‘innocent joy,’ it was clear he hadn’t slept in weeks, because
anyone who was of sound mind would know the Mets had
backed into a pennant race, and that other teams took great
offense when that ‘innocent joy’ spilled out of the dugout and
into unsportsmanlike range.
“Lastings Milledge, who was not at Shea yesterday, admitted
Saturday his exuberant post-home run high-five with Jose Reyes
in the on-deck circle likely incited the Marlins, but Milledge said
he didn’t care, he’d do it again. Milledge, like Reyes, did not run
hard to first base in Game 161 of the season, during a home stand
when the Mets went 1-6.
“Reyes, who was not at Shea yesterday, said Saturday he
wouldn’t back down from fighting Florida’s Miguel Olivo.
Seriously? With the playoffs on the line, Reyes would rather
defend his manhood than the season? There are people who
believe the moment Reyes went from being a 24-year-old
superstar to a malcontent mope can be traced back to Rickey
Henderson’s appointment by Minaya as a coach. There are
people who believe the nothing-to-play-for Marlines, 8-1
winners Sunday, were highly motivated to crush the Mets.
“ ‘We probably realize we ticked some people off, that we
probably overdid our celebrations,’ said Damion Easley. And
when did they realize this? ‘Technically,’ Easley said, ‘April.’
“Some of the Mets admit now they were complacent after
cruising to a double-digit division lead. Carlos Delgado spoke
yesterday of how he hoped the team learned a lesson about
staying ‘focused and sharp for 162 games.’ Would that include
running hard, remembering how many outs there are and
rejoicing with class?
“ ‘That could be a very good reason why we didn’t play as good
as we should have,’ Delgado said. ‘Some of those issues were
addressed, and the good thing is you’ll never hear about it
because if it’s done the right way you’ll never find out about it.’
“So he was comfortable the issues were buried? ‘No,’ Delgado
said, ‘because it kind of happened again. But they were
addressed.’
“Standards and accountability start from the top.”
Unfreakin’ real. What a bunch of total jerks, idiots, and a-holes;
the tri-fecta.
Clyde Haberman / New York Times
“On Sept. 3, a comfortable five games ahead of their nearest rival
after cruising to a fourth straight victory, the New York Mets
announced their strategy for the postseason. Fans had a week to
register for an online ticket lottery that would determine who’d
get to watch the team in the first round of the playoffs.
“On one level, the announcement was to be expected. Any
business must make plans. But on another level, one with its
own space-time continuum, it was the moral equivalent of
hanging out a ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner. The season, after
all, still had 25 games left.
“The ancient Greeks, though they never had to hit a knuckle-
curve or a four-seam fastball, saw it coming 2,500 years ago.
They called it hubris: overbearing pride, with fatal retribution
lying in wait.
“The Mets, perpetrators and sufferers of one of the worst late-
season collapses in baseball history, proved to be deeper in
hubris than in relief pitching or clutch hitting….
“Some of the players liked to celebrate good times with leaping,
bumping dances that were one part joy and one part rubbing the
other team’s nose in its own misery. They also said things that
smacked uncomfortably of arrogance unbridled.
“ ‘We’ve got so much talent, I think sometimes we get bored,’
the first baseman Carlos Delgado said in September. The pitcher
Pedro Martinez said much the same. So did Tom Glavine, who
on Sunday was to pitching what the Titanic was to ocean
voyages. When you have as much talent as this team does, he
had said, ‘I guess you can get complacent at times.’
Joel Sherman / New York Post
“Tom Glavine came here during a previous administration,
before Omar Minaya and Willie Randolph, before Pedro
Martinez and Carlos Beltran, and before Jose Reyes or David
Wright had even played a manor-league game.
“He was bought for big money to help transfer a certain aura, a
certain feel, a certain winning sense from Atlanta to the Flushing
part of New York.
“But that has never fully happened. Glavine pitched well here,
but his heart always seemed in Atlanta. And he might have
saved his absolute worst for the closing act of his Mets career.
This will no longer be remembered as the year Glavine won his
300th game, at least not around here it won’t. This will be
remembered as the year Glavine pitched the Mets out of a season
in Game 162.
“This final game will be remembered for Glavine lasting nine
batters and one out and long enough to surrender seven runs. He
lasted long enough to make sure the Mets’ season didn’t last any
longer.
“There were many villains in a collapse both epic and pathetic,
and the Shea crowd was not shy at treating players such as Jose
Reyes and Guillermo Mota yesterday as if they were Roger
Clemens after he plunked Mike Piazza. Reyes, in many respects,
symbolized the team: great and beloved in the first half, terrible
and derided down the stretch.
“But Glavine was as culpable as any Met for a demise stunning
and unfathomable. He was miserable in late September. And
yesterday, 24 hours after the inexperienced John Maine
resuscitated the Mets with one of the five best performances in
club history, specifically because of the time of year, the
Cooperstown-bound Glavine pretty much single-handedly
assured the death of this season with one of the five worst
performances in club history, specifically because of the time of
the year….
“ ‘I’m not devastated, I’m disappointed,’ Glavine said. ‘This is
not the way I wanted to pitch.’
“Nevertheless, Glavine suggested he made most of the pitches he
wanted yesterday, that he was undermined by well-placed
grounders. But Glavine is going to the Hall of Fame as a finesse
master because enough balls have been hit at fielders. He,
therefore, cannot alibi away yesterday because balls were hit
hard enough to find holes, especially when you add in his two
walks, his horrid throwing error and that he ended his day (Mets
career, career in total?) by hitting the opposing starter, Dontrelle
Willis, with a changeup….
“Glavine’s departure essentially triggered a three-hour wake at
Shea, the fans looking on at the most expensive, frustrating,
underachieving corpse in franchise history.
“Still, Glavine insisted that, despite a poor effort in career start
No. 669, he is glad about his Mets days. He believes the
organization transformed from a slum to a contender while he
was a key piece. But it feels now as if the Mets ran 25 miles of a
marathon with Glavine here, and now are backtracking with this
kind of collapse. They have yet to get through 26 miles as hoped
when Glavine was imported from Atlanta.
“And now with the Braves or retirement possible for Glavine and
the Mets at a crossroads again as an organization, it appears they
are never going to make it to that hoped for finish line together.”
Quotes from Mets ballplayers the final weekend.
David Wright (who mostly “got it”): [After Friday night’s loss]
“Personally, I am embarrassed. I think it’s embarrassing, it’s
pretty pathetic that we have this division within our grasp with
seven home games and can’t find a way to win one of them. It’s
a bad feeling, a feeling that the fans deserve better, ownership
deserves better, the front office deserves better, Willie and the
coaching staff deserve better. This is on the players. It’s easy to
point a finger, but the 25 in this clubhouse need to look at each
other and that’s where the blame is.”
David Wright: [After Sunday’s final loss] “I still think we have
the best collection of players in the league. But we were horrible
down the stretch. We did this to ourselves.”
Mike Vaccaro in response: “That’s only half true, because they
did this to their fans, too; fans who will now have to silently
endure the NL playoff games that would have included the Mets
with one more victory, fans who will have to endure another
October in which the Yankees will dominate the town.
“Asked what he would tell that wounded clientele, manager
Willie Randolph said, ‘We’re devastated, too. Real Met fans
know we gave everything we had.’
“Actually, most real Met fans have eyes. They know better than
that.”
Paul Lo Duca (another who mostly “got it”): [After Friday’s
loss] “I haven’t slept in two weeks. It’s not fun. It’s the worst
I’ve ever felt with a baseball uniform on. I know there’s people
over in a war and people dying, and I know it’s just a game. But
professional-wise, for a game, this is as gut-wrenching as it can
be.”
Lo Duca [After Sunday’s loss]: “It’s tough, no excuses. One
through 25, to me we’re all responsible. We got every chance in
the world and we didn’t deserve to go….It’s going to hurt for
awhile.”
Moises Alou: [After Friday’s loss] “We have to keep our heads
up…and find a way into the playoffs no matter how. We’re the
Mets, a great team and we should be playing better than this.”
Billy Wagner, as quoted in New York magazine: [In defending
the performance of the bullpen] “We’ve been throwing four
innings a night – for months! Our pitching coach has no
experience talking to a bullpen. He can help you mechanically,
but he can’t tell you emotions. He has no idea what it feels like.
And neither does Willie. They’re not a lot of help, put it that
way.”
Wagner was forced to apologize to Willie and Rick Peterson.
Jose Reyes (who never “got it”): [After Sunday’s loss] “It was a
good year for me, there’s no doubt. But we want to be in the
playoffs, so I don’t worry about my numbers right now. We’re
kind of disappointed right now, because we had it right there and
we let it go.”
Carlos Delgado (who also never “got it”): [After Sunday’s loss]
“We were too good to finish like this.”
Willie Randolph: [After Sunday’s loss] “I’m a big boy. I know
how things work. I know that I’m accountable for my job.”
Actor Matt Dillon, Mets fanatic: “This is what it means to be a
diehard, a truly diehard fan. I’m still a Mets fan – of course I
am. I’m a diehard, diehard fan.” Dillon didn’t want to leave
Shea on Sunday and his friends had to drag him out, he was
so distraught.
Fan Joe Bajzath, 30, of Fair Lawn, N.J., as reported by the New
York Post: “They just choked, f—ing choked. We’re drinking
all night. We have to be drinking all night.”
William Rhoden / New York Times
“Before the Philadelphia game with Washington on Sunday I
listened to an interview with Pat Gillick, the Phillies’ general
manager. Gillick was once Toronto’s general manager and won
five division titles with them along with two World Series.
“Gillick said that for many years he felt that talent was
everything. But he said after watching Philadelphia overcome
injuries and other adversity this season and overtake the Mets, he
had concluded that talent was overrated.
“Talent is important, he said, but what is more important is
mental toughness, character, passion and the desire to win.
“ ‘These are things that cannot be measured,’ he said. But
perhaps they can be, in the space and time it takes for a team to
collapse with 17 games left.
“Moving forward, Minaya and Randolph may want to use a new
measuring stick.”
Hal Bodley / USA Today
“I covered the ’64 (Phils) collapse. I believe the Mets’ fall is
greater.”
Some relevant statistics:
Mets had the third-highest payroll in the league.
They were in sole possession of first place from May 16 to Sept.
27.
Mets lost 12 of their last 17. The Phillies won 13 of 17.
Mets pitchers had a staff ERA of 5.96 over the final 17.
Mets team ERA for ‘07
April 2.96
May 3.69
June 4.20
July 4.50
Aug. 4.93
Sept. 5.11
The seven runs allowed in the first inning on Sunday was just the
third such occurrence in franchise history.
The Mets played their final seven games at home against sub-
.500 teams and went 1-6. They were 1-9 in their last 10 home
games and finished with just a 41-40 record at Shea for the
season.
The Mets didn’t have a 5-game win streak until Aug. 31-Sept. 4.
Jose Reyes hit .251 with a .316 on-base percentage after the All-
Star Game, compared with a .307 batting average and a .387 on-
base percentage before the July break. Reyes hit .240 the final
two months, .205 in September. He was 2-for-23 (.087) over the
final five games.
Glavine had a 14.81 ERA in his final three starts, giving up 25
hits in 10 innings.
Only two other teams in baseball history failed to close out a
September lead of as many as seven games – the 1938 Pirates,
who led by that many on Sept. 1, and the 1934 New York Giants,
whose last seven-game lead was on Sept. 6. The 1964 Phillies
owned a 6 ½-game lead on Sept. 20.
Philadelphia’s Jimmy Rollins hit .346 vs. the Mets with 6 HR,
15 RBI in 18 games. My man!!!
[Sources: New York Daily News…Peter Botte, Adam Rubin,
Lisa Olson; New York Post… Mike Vaccaro, Mark Hale, Mike
Puma, Joel Sherman, Jana Winter, Joe Mollica; Bloomberg
News…Danielle Sessa; New York Times…William Rhoden,
George Vecsey, Ben Shpigel, Clyde Haberman; USA
Today…Hal Bodley; Star-Ledger…Steve Politi, Dan Graziano]
—
Stuff
–I miss Gil Hodges. You think he would’ve put up with Reyes?
–I thought my brother had one of the best lines during the Mets
swoon, as the pitching staff imploded.
“Is there any rule against the team using Mr. Met on the
mound?”
I had to remind him that Major League Baseball would
undoubtedly have tested him for steroids due to Mr. Met’s huge,
tell-tale head.
–Michael O’Keefe of the New York Daily News reported on
Barry Bonds’ former mistress, Kimberly Bell, and her upcoming
November Playboy spread (on newsstands Friday). Bell has an
in-depth article as well in the issue and in promoting it told
O’Keefe, “(Barry) surrounds himself with yes people. I don’t
think he ever considered where (his steroid use) would lead.”
Bell tells Playboy she learned to exaggerate her reactions (ahem)
to make Barry feel better when it came to their sex life (cough
cough).
“Bell told Playboy that Bonds suffered from sexual dysfunction,
one side effect of steroid use. He tried Viagra several times but
didn’t like it because it affected his vision and stuffed up his
nose.” [Huh…never knew this last bit.]
Bell also notes that when Barry started using all the substances,
“It went from ‘I want to know where you are at’ to ‘I’m gonna
f—— kill you. I’m gonna cut your head off and leave you in a
ditch.’”
Nice guy…that Barry Bonds.
–As nice as the dirtballs at Madison Square Garden, that is. I
can’t begin to tell you how many of my friends have written and
drawn the comparison of the days of our youth, late 60s/early
70s, with today.
As in comparing Isiah Thomas and his band of thugs (led by
Stephon Marbury) to the days of Red Holzman, Willis Reed,
Dave DeBuscherre, Bill Bradley, Clyde and Earl Monroe, for
starters. There should be no need to expound further on this.
Except to say that next up for the World’s Most Infamous Arena
is the sexual harassment suit involving a New York Rangers
cheerleader and management’s book of ‘Kama Sutra’ desires.
–College Football picks:
Putting my 3-1 record on the line…
Indiana, giving 13 ½ to Minnesota
Miami, giving 7 to UNC
Penn State, giving 8 ½ to Iowa
Virginia, giving 10 to Middle Tennessee State
[These are Wednesday’s lines]
Remember, kids; get your parents’ permission before betting
anything over $22,000.
–In 1920, Babe Ruth had 54 homers and 137 RBI. He earned
$20,000, or $205,500 in today’s dollars. By comparison, A-Rod
earned $27 million this season.
Ah, but now it’s playoff time for the Yankees and the
disingenuous one. For you casual fans out there, A-Rod is 5 for
46 in his last 13 playoff games, while Derek Jeter hit .339 in the
same contests.
But the Yankees deserve a ton of credit for rallying big time after
a 21-29 start in ’07. Any fan of the sport can’t help but admire
them and it’s not just about having the biggest payroll.
Obviously, the farm system has also been producing the past few
years.
–Trevor Hoffman, closer. Unbelievable. The all-time saves
leader in the history of baseball choked big time the last two
games of the season for San Diego. But at least he handled the
meltdowns with class in the clubhouse afterwards.
–Men’s Soccer Top Five
1. Wake Forest 2. UConn 3. Notre Dame 4. Virginia 5. Duke
–The PGA Tour gave David Duval and Dudley Hart special
exemptions for 2008 due to family issues. I didn’t realize that
both were out of action since April (Hart) and May as the players
took care of their very sick wives, with both then having to care
for their young kids.
This was a big move for the PGA, which heretofore only allowed
players to take a one-time (legitimate) medical exemption if they
failed to finish in the top 125 on the money list, or a one-time
exemption if the golfer was in the top 25 on the career money list
and they wanted to retain their card for the following season.
Duval returned to action last week and will play one more time
this fall.
Wake’s Bill Haas has done well in his first two fall events and
has secured his card for next year. Go Deacs!
–Thanks to the baseball pennant races and college football, I
spent all of about an hour following the Presidents Cup,
especially once I saw the results for the first two days. In fact I
was so underwhelmed, I forgot to report the final result…so for
the archives, the U.S. won 19 ½-14 ½.
–We note the passing of Al Oerter, the great four-time Olympic
gold medal winner in the discus…1956, 60, 64, and 68. Oerter
and Carl Lewis are the only track and field stars to capture the
same event in four consecutive Olympics. [For Lewis it was the
long jump.] But Oerter is the only one to set an Olympic record
in each of his wins.
Oerter was born on Aug. 19, 1936 in Astoria, N.Y. and had
learned the discuss in high school where he set a national prep
school record. He then went to the University of Kansas and
immediately set the NCAA record, but as Diane Pucin of the Los
Angeles Times reports, when he went to Melbourne for the ’56
Games, it was his first major international competition.
–Mark R. used to fly fighter jets in the Air Force and when he
read about the bird striking the plane last weekend, it reminded
him of a time when he came within 50 feet of colliding with an
incoming flock of Canadian geese at 22,000 feet! Actually,
geese formations have been spotted as high as 25,000 and as
Mark noted, it’s the last thing you expect to see, cruising at that
level. Let’s just say had Mark hit one, going at Mach III, or
something like that, he wouldn’t have been calling me with this
tale.
–Talk about a bunch of BS, researchers are trying to convince us
the sabretooth tiger didn’t have as strong a bite as his rather
massive canines would indicate.
It seems the rap on one of my favorite guard animals is that it
couldn’t clamp down on your neck like a lion can. Instead, it had
to leap at its prey, or use its teeth like ice-picks in climbing an
enemy’s back.
At least Colin McHenry of the University of Newcastle in
Australia said:
“The sabretooth was bear-like; it was massively strong – huge
forequarters, powerful limbs. It was not an animal that was built
for running; it was built for wrestling other animals to the
ground….
“When it got the prey under control, that’s when the teeth come
into play, and there’s one instantly fatal bite to the neck, severing
the airway and carotid arteries to the brain. Death is more or less
instantaneous.”
The sabretooth tiger…the official prehistoric animal of Bar Chat.
–I thought the redesigned naturalization test put out by the U.S.
Citizenship and Immigration Services, 100 questions, would
provide some bar chat, but alas, it’s pretty straight forward. You
need to get six of 10 questions asked orally out of the pool of 100
but I do see that one prospective question is “Name one
American Indian tribe in the United States.” Don’t forget the
‘Casinos,’ one of the wealthier ones.
–I’ll have further comments on Duke president Richard
Brodhead in my next ‘Week in Review’ column, not that I have a
lot to do with that one.
–Dan L. passed along a story from Roger Friedman of Fox News
concerning the ongoing scandal with the Rock and Roll Hall of
Fame selections.
“After the announcement…of the nominees’ ballot….there’s
only one thing to do: Hit (Rolling Stone) publisher Jann Wenner,
who controls the Rock Hall, where it hurts. [Boycott the
magazine.]
“If you love rock ‘n’ roll, stop buying Rolling Stone until the
tremendous insults of the Hall of Fame are corrected.
[Ed. I have a subscription…can’t boycott it, need it for the
column.]
“Wenner’s nominating committee consists largely of his current
and former employees from Rolling Stone. But they have little
say over who really is inducted.
“Last year, in a story reported by this column exclusively,
Wenner threw out a vote in which the classic British invasion
group Dave Clark Five was voted in and changed it for another
round that favored rappers Grandmaster Flash.
“As one insider from the Hall has maintained, ‘Once Ahmet
Ertegun died, Jann felt like he could run wild.’ The legendary
co-founder of Atlantic Records was considered the only person
who could control Wenner.
“The Dave Clark Five incident has repercussions, however. I’m
told that Wenner was made to meet Clark after I broke the story
last March. The group now is guaranteed entry, although it’s a
bittersweet win. They are probably not, to paraphrase one of
their hits, ‘Glad All Over.’
“But this year’s choices are a complete affront to fans of the
Rock and Roll Hall. And to show how much Wenner controls
what’s happening, the exclusive announcement was made on
Rolling Stone’s Web site.
“This year’s ballot shows that the Hall has skipped over the
seminal 1970s for the worthless ‘80s. The committee has chosen
dance music over rock. They’ve all but ignored the pioneers
who influenced the genre in favor of non-sequiturs.
“The choices: dance group Chic, hip-hop pioneer Afrika
Bambaataa, mediocre Bruce Springsteen-wannabe John
Mellencamp (a Wenner crony who’s lost out on many tries),
white rappers the Beastie Boys, disco queen Donna Summer and,
of course, Madonna.
“Among ‘older’ names: the aforementioned DC5,
instrumentalists the Ventures and Leonard Cohen.
“Here’s the idea: that these names should enter the Rock and
Roll Hall of Fame before such historically important and
influential acts as Iggy Pop and the Stooges, ‘fifth Beatle’ Billy
Preston or performer/producer Todd Rundgren.
“They aren’t the only ones. Major groups the Hall voters deem
‘not hip’: The Moody Blues (simply for ‘Days of Future Passed’)
and Chicago (for its first two seminal albums). Hall & Oates,
Yes, Genesis, J. Geils Band, Alice Cooper and KISS are also
names often mentioned by critics.
“Also left wanting: stars such as Carly Simon and Linda
Ronstadt, who were mainstays of Rolling Stone in the 1970s,
have been iced out. Carole King was inducted only as a writer
with ex-husband Gerry Goffin. Her achievement as the creator
of ‘Tapestry,’ for years the best-selling album of all time, has
been ignored.
“Neil Sedaka is not in the Hall of Fame. Neither is Neil
Diamond. That’s right. They only wrote half the hits that
modern groups cover or sample. Go figure.”
It goes on and on…as readers know from my own pieces over
the years on the topic. Friedman also notes the absence of Laura
Nyro, Leon Russell, Glen Campbell, Sonny Bono (the last three
for their work in Phil Spector’s legendary band), Tina Turner,
Dionne Warwick, Mary Wells, the Marvelettes, the Spinners,
Ben E. King, Darlene Love, Joe Tex, Al Green, Chubby
Checker.
John Fogerty, Lou Reed, Peter Gabriel, Ringo Starr, Tom Waits,
Steve Winwood, Diana Ross (as a solo artist), Steve Miller,
Randy Newman, the Hollies, Tom Jones, Mitch Ryder, Aaron
Neville, the Turtles, Gram Parsons, Three Dog Night.
And Friedman doesn’t even get to mention Petula Clark!!!!
Yup, it’s pathetic.
–Finally, as I go to post Wednesday, it appears Grandpa Jim in
“For Worse….” is kicking the bucket. Jeff B. and I held an
emergency session Wednesday morning to attempt to come up
with the cause of death. We couldn’t decide whether it’s tainted
beef, loose magnets, or, because Jim had turned infantile, lead
paint exposure from chewing on the grandkids’ toys.
But then Jeff suggested that Iris’ look of sheer panic is really just
intended to throw us all off course. Jeff is good at this stuff…
very good…and the only thing that could save the strip is for Iris
to be arrested for murder, whereupon she breaks down on the
stand and discloses everything she knows about Dr. Patterson’s
drug ring.
Top 3 songs for the week of 10/3/70: #1 “Ain’t No Mountain
High Enough” (Diana Ross) #2 “Lookin’ Out My Back Door”
(Creedence Clearwater Revival) #3 “Candida” (Dawn)…and…
#4 “Cracklin’ Rose” (Neil Diamond) #5 “Julie, Do Ya Love
Me” (Bobby Sherman) #6 “I’ll Be There” (The Jackson 5) #7
“(I Know) I’m Losing You” (Rare Earth) #8 “Snowbird” (Anne
Murray) #9 “War” (Edwin Starr) #10 “All Right Now” (Free)
NCAA Football Quiz: 1) Miami QBs, 1987-91: ’87 / Steve
Walsh; ’88 / Steve Walsh and Craig Erickson; ’89 / Craig
Erickson and Gino Torretta; ’90 / Craig Erickson; ’91 / Gino
Torretta 2) Johnny Musso was ‘Bama’s TB 1969-71. Yes, this
was a selfish one because I loved Musso, but the “Italian
Stallion” had 2,750 yards rushing over this period for squads that
went 6-5, 6-5-1, 11-1. 3) Steve Sloan and Kenny Stabler
replaced Namath in ’65. Sloan played a lot in ’64, Namath’s
senior season, when Joe Willie got hurt.
Next Bar Chat, Monday…back to normal. Actually, I might
have to throw in a little more on “Mets Hubris!”
