NBA Rookies of the Year Quiz: Who am I? 1) 1971-72…initials
S.W. 2) 1973-74…initials E.D. 3) 1982-83…initials T.C. 4)
1988-89…initials M.R. 5) 1995-96…initials D.S. Answers
below.
Roger Clemens
I watched the entire hearing and unfortunately time does not
permit me to cover it as fully as I normally would, simply
because I need to post this full column at this moment.
Let’s just say I was impressed the first two hours by the
performance of Congress, and then it began to deteriorate thanks
to the disgraceful antics from the likes of Cong. Dan Burton (R-In),
Cong. Darrell Issa (R-Ca.), and Paul Kanjorski (D-Pa). I was so
incensed by Burton and his total inability to understand that what
someone tells a reporter isn’t comparable to what may be said
under oath in a deposition that I called his Washington office to
register my complaint. [The aide picking up the phone was very
polite and professional, unlike his boss.]
Roger Clemens kept saying of Andy Pettitte, “He misremembers
our conversations.” On the other hand, Pettitte, and Chuck
Knoblauch, are telling us one of their esteemed teammates is
lying. Clemens also has us believe “I have not read the entire
Mitchell report.” Your editor read the entire Mitchell report
from his hotel room in Berlin, Germany, last December in about
90 minutes! Clemens can’t even tell the truth on that. And now
we have a new nanny-gate to boot.
So can you possibly believe Roger Clemens? I’m floored by the
comments on ESPN that two-thirds of the people in their various
polls believe Clemens is lying. I’m floored it’s not 95%!
And not for nothing, but while baseball takes a big hit these days,
what about steroid abuse in football in terms of its influence on
our nation’s youth?
You’ll have to allow me to comment further next bar chat for my
own record. But for now, remember the Clemens-Mike Piazza
incident. That wasn’t B-12 rage, sports fans.
—
Uno!
Growing up, I only had one dog, a mut by the name of Ralph,
named after baseball great Ralph Kiner. I was ten-years-old and
it wasn’t hard to remember the exact day I got him because it
was also the day Detroit Tigers pitcher Denny McLain won his
30th game in 1968. As we watched the game on the basement
television, Ralph relieved himself on my leg; failing our first
attempt at paper training.
Ralph was part wirefox terrier and beagle with a ton of
personality and I can’t help but think of him with the win on
Tuesday by Uno the beagle at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog
Show, the first of his breed to capture the title.
Richard Sandomir / New York Times
“(Judge Dr. J. Donald) Jones watched each dog enter to the
fanfare of dimmed house lights at Madison Square Garden and a
double spotlight. The standard poodle trotted out first for a lap
around the green-carpeted floor, followed by the Akita, the
Weimaraner, the Australian shepherd, the beagle (to thunderous
applause, as if Willis Reed had walked into the arena one last
time), the Sealyham terrier and, finally, the toy poodle.
“The judge could hear Uno, the 15-inch beagle, baying as he
gave his once-over to the standard poodle. And when he
completed his observations, he needed four minutes before he
pointed to the winner: Uno, the beagle, who will turn 3 in May.
“Snoopy would be pleased. His breed, long passed over for
glory, had finally triumphed.”
Valentine’s Day
[Trader George and I were talking the other day of how we were
sick of the V-Day commercials for Vermont Teddy Bear and
Pajamarama…or whatever it is. That said, I have to use the
opportunity to resurrect some material from six- and eight-years
ago.]
Back in 1754, according to the “Encyclopedia of American Facts
and Dates” (edited by Gorton Carruth), a colonial girl recorded
the following:
“Last Friday was St. Valentine’s Day, and the night before I got
five bay leaves and pinned four on the corners of my pillow and
the fifth to the middle; and then if I dreamt of my sweetheart,
Betty said we should be married before the year was out. But to
make it more sure I boiled an egg hard and took out the yolk and
filled it with salt; and when I went to bed ate it shell and all,
without speaking or drinking after it. [Ed. I never speak while
drinking grog.] We also wrote our lovers’ names on bits of
paper, and rolled them up in clay and put them into water; and
the first that rose up was to be our Valentine. Would you think
it? Mr. Blossom was my man. I lay abed and shut my eyes all
the morning, till he came to our house, for I would not have seen
another man before him for all the world.”
It was about this time that the history of valentines in America
began. Guides containing valentine verses were imported from
England and many senders in America simply copied these.
But when it comes to the real origin for the holiday, Harry K. has
allowed me to use some material he forwarded on to his friends
the other day.
—
Valentine’s Day was named after Saint Valentine, though the
Catholic Church has at least three that may qualify for the real
title. The most likely candidate is a 3rd century priest named
Valentine. When Emperor Claudius II decided single men made
better soldiers than married ones, he outlawed marriage for all
young men, the better to insure a good crop of catapult fodder
(cannons not having been invented yet). Valentine, legend has it,
thought that decree was unfair, and continued to perform
weddings in secret. Claudius discovered his actions, and had
him arrested and sentenced to death. Other stories suggest that
Valentine was killed for helping Christians escape harsh Roman
prisons where they were routinely tortured and beaten.
Anyway, the legend we’re sticking with has it that Valentine,
while on death row, fell in love with his jailer’s daughter, who
visited him during his confinement. Before his execution he is
alleged to have sent her a note, signed “from your Valentine,” a
phrase still used today. By the Middle Ages, St. Valentine was
one of the most popular saints in England and France.
Valentine’s Day is thought by some to be on the anniversary of
his execution (around 270 AD). More likely is the notion that
the early Church decided to hold the feast day for the popular
saint in mid-February to ‘christianize’ celebrations of the pagan
festival Lupercalia. In ancient Rome, Lupercalia was the official
beginning of spring and celebrated on the Ides of February, as a
festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman God of Fertility.
Members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would
gather at Romulus and Remus’s sacred cave, and sacrifice a goat
for fertility, and a dog for purification. Then they would slice the
goat hide into strips, dip them into the sacrificial blood, and boys
would run through the streets of Rome, gently slapping any
women they encountered with the goat hide strips. Women
welcomed being hit with the strips because they believed it
would make them more fertile in the year ahead. Later in the
day, all the single women in Rome would put their names in a
large urn. The city’s bachelors would then pull a name and
become paired for the year with that woman. Many of these
pairings later resulted in marriages.
Around 498 AD, Pope Gelasius declared February 14th as St.
Valentine’s Day. He also declared the Roman lottery system for
romantic pairing was Un-Christian and banned it. During the
Middle Ages, it was a common belief that Feb. 14th was the
beginning of birds’ mating season, adding to the idea that
Valentine’s Day should be a day for romance.
As for the connection of Valentine’s Day to chocolate, while it
dates back to the Aztecs, it was only available as a drink up until
1847, when a Dutch chemist invented the chocolate press, which
allowed the production of chocolate candies. In 1876, Daniel
Peter, a Swiss candy maker, invented milk chocolate. As far as
links between the holiday and the sweet, there are some possible
connections. (1) Chocolate candy appeared about the same time
as cheap postal service became available to the general public,
and gained in popularity along with the practice of sending
valentines, (2) chocolate contains Phenylethylamine (PEA),
which is a chemical produced naturally by the body when you
are in love. That “rush of infatuation” is really a drug-induced
high, which explains the reasoning behind men thinking up the
idea of giving chocolate to women they wanted to woo – they
were plying them with drugs!
Lastly, don’t feed chocolate to your dogs. It’s toxic, due to the
presence of the chemical theobromine. Rover won’t croak if he
only snarfs up a few M&Ms, but larger amounts could kill the
old boy.
St. Valentine’s Day Massacre
The era of prohibition was from 1920-33. Thanks to the 18th
Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, alcohol was illegal. Or
more specifically, the prohibition of the “manufacturing, sale, or
transportation” of alcohol. It was the culmination of a long
campaign by church and women’s groups, Populists, temperance
societies and countless others. Of course, Prohibition led to a
spectacular increase in crime as bootlegging took hold and over
200,000 speak-easies sprouted across the nation.
That’s where Al Capone came in. A sixth-grade dropout who
once beat up his teacher, he became the nation’s most notorious
gangster, with an army of maybe 1,000 henchmen. Capone once
boasted: “I own the police!”
Capone’s chief rival was George “Bugs” Moran. Actually,
Capone had eliminated just about all of them except Moran. The
feud between the two was legendary. Moran had once tried to
eliminate Capone by slipping acid into his soup.
Moran’s headquarters were at a garage at 2122 N. Clark Street in
Chicago. It was also his booze-peddling depot, marked S.M.C.
Cartage Co. On the morning of February 14, 1929, six of
Moran’s gang were at the garage, waiting for coffee. A 7th,
tinkering with a van, was also present.
Around 10:30, a blue car pulled up by the garage. Four men got
out, two dressed as cops, two shabbily dressed. The “cops”
carried sub-machine guns, the other two, shotguns. The
gangsters raised their hands over their heads and the four visitors
marched them to the back of the garage where they were lined up
against the wall. As they were being frisked for weapons, one of
them asked what was happening. That’s when the word went out
to “give it to ‘em!” 100 bullets were fired. Only 8 reached the
wall behind the victims. One man tried to escape but a bullet shot
at nearly point blank range ripped through his head.
A neighbor reported that she saw two men, who looked like
police officers, walking out of the building with two others in
normal clothing. The two normally-dressed men held their hands
over their heads. When the real police showed up, they counted
six dead with one dying.
Until then the country had romanticized gangsters. The St.
Valentine’s Day Massacre changed that. It was the worst single
act of violence even for crime-ridden Chicago.
Capone and his gang were suspected of instigating and carrying
out the massacre. President Herbert Hoover wanted Capone
behind bars. It took a few years but the feds finally nailed him –
for tax evasion. [Source: Angie Cannon, U.S. News & World
Report]
Roy Scheider
I didn’t have the time to do anything other than note his passing
the other day and I forgot my brother’s story on his little
encounter with the great actor back in 1980. So I now pass it
along.
“When I was living in New York, I went to meet some friends
one evening at a bar in Midtown. The bar was one of those
narrow and deep Manhattan establishments. You went in and
there was a long crowded bar that seemed to go on forever that
ended in a fishhook.
“I was early and pushed my way to the back and saw none of my
friends had arrived. I rounded the end of the bar and sat down at
the end of the fishhook where I had a bartender’s view of all of
the patrons. I ordered a drink and watched the crowd. It seemed
like a theater crowd, kind of artsy, but not actors or theater
people themselves.
“All of the sudden there was a great commotion and everyone
was looking toward the front of the room and cheering. Here
comes Roy Scheider. He waved off the applause modestly. I
remembered he was appearing in a Harold Pinter play on
Broadway (“Betrayal”) and realized this was some sort of post-
performance get-together.
“The crowd was somewhat boisterous and lots of people were
slapping Scheider on the back. The crowd seemed to swallow
him up.
“Then he somehow popped up on the other side of the crowd.
Like a cartoon character, he stepped away from the crowd that
seemed to still think he was in the middle of the mob.
“Scheider stepped quickly away and slipped into a seat directly
across from me. He glanced back and ordered a drink. Scheider
picked it up, then looked across at me and I smiled. He looked
back at the crowd, then at me and raised his eyebrows and gave
the crowd a little nod, as if to say, ‘Did you see that?’
“I looked at the crowd and at Scheider and nodded. He rolled his
eyes and looked at the ceiling and smiled back at me. ‘What I
have to put up with!’ he seemed to say.
“Then he gave me a resigned grin and raised his glass in my
direction. I raised mine and we toasted each other. He put his
glass down and looked back at the crowd. I said nothing to him
and now some of the crowd noticed he was sitting behind them.
As the crowd turned its attention on him I didn’t look up at him
any more and he seemed to disappear in the mob. They all left
before my own friends arrived.”
Harry could have added that he lived for a spell directly across
the street from Maplewood, New Jersey’s Columbia High
School, where Scheider was a student. [Scheider then went on to
Rutgers, later transferring to Franklin and Marshall College in
Lancaster, Pa.]
As for his role in “Jaws,” Scheider originally wasn’t slated to
play Chief Brody (Charlton Heston and Paul Newman among
those whose names were floated), but as Stephen Whitty of the
Star-Ledger notes, “Scheider’s presence made that movie.
Frightened (but determined to keep it under control),
overwhelmed (but insistent on seeing it through), he was a
modern movie hero – the cowardly Everyman who conquers his
fear.”
Unfortunately for Scheider, after his star turn his contract
obligated him to do a second “Jaws” picture and he lost out to
Robert De Niro for “The Deer Hunter” as a result.
Scheider once told the AP in 1986, “I’ve been fortunate to do
what I consider three landmark films. ‘The French Connection’
spawned a whole era of the relationship between two policemen,
based on an enormous amount of truth about working on the job.
‘Jaws’ was the first big blockbuster outdoor-adventure film. And
certainly ‘All That Jazz’ is not like any old MGM musical. Each
one of those films is unique, and I consider myself fortunate to
be associated with them.”
Stuff
–In keeping with Black History Month, it’s interesting to note
that 60 years ago the all-black Harlem Globetrotters upset the all-
white, George Mikan-led world champion Minneapolis Lakers,
61-59, before a Chicago crowd of 17,823. As Ben Green, author
of a book on the history of the Globetrotters put it, “What made
this so significant was Mikan and that it was the Lakers and that
they were the dominant white team. They were the best white
team in the country playing the best black team in the country.
It’s clearly the most important game in Globetrotters history.”
Nine days later the Globetrotters won a rematch, 49-45. Blacks
then began to integrate professional basketball and in 1950, three
former Globetrotters – Nat “Sweetwater” Clifton, Chuck Cooper
and Earl Lloyd – became the first on NBA teams.
[Source: Scott Boeck / USA Today]
–The other day Chris Haslam of the London Times had a
distressing story concerning private game parks in South Africa
and Zimbabwe, the kind where tourists have the opportunity to
see wildlife up close and personal, including the handling of lion
cubs. The parks like to say that in paying the entrance fee, you
have “the chance to become a conservationist.” Antelope Park,
in Zimbabwe, has a program called African Lion Environmental
Research Trust that is supported by actor Ralph Fiennes.
But the Times’ Sunday edition learned that as many as 59 lion
cubs raised at Antelope Park have then been sold to big-game
hunting operations to be shot for sport…. ‘canned hunting,’
“where rich trophy-hunters pay thousands of pounds to shoot big
game in fenced enclosures, is big business in southern Africa.
The price of shooting a lion bred in captivity ranges from about
($18,000 to $30,000), and the breeders who supply the trade are
struggling to keep up with demand.”
I just have to repeat a related story I wrote up about 16 months
ago.
Jurgen Krause, the personal cook for former East German
Communist leader Erich Honecker, had come forward to talk of
how some of the world’s dictators bagged their game trophies.
As reported by Roger Boyes of the London Times:
“Official photographs of Honecker’s catch in the 1970s and
1980s show hundreds of hares arranged in circles or a clutch of
proud tyrants inspecting slaughtered stags.
“In fact, says Krause, much of the swag was shot in advance and
came straight out of the deep freeze. ‘While Honecker and his
guests were wading through the woods, most of the hares had
already been caught and strung up by professional hunters.
Many had not even been properly defrosted.’”
Romania’s Nicolae Ceausescu “was a vainglorious bear shooter.
He was helped by secret agents who injected Valium into pots of
honey to slow down the prey.”
As for Leonid Brezhnev, “Polish agents trained a bison for six
months to stroll from one side of a forest to another so that it was
ready to be shot by the Kremlin leader. Marksmen were hiding
among the bushes to down the bison had Mr. Brezhnev missed.
Large stretches of forest land across Eastern Europe, surrounded
by electric fencing, were filled with wild boar, foxes and elk
made fat and slow by being fed specially imported maize.”
–I didn’t want to comment on Florida Panthers forward Richard
Zednik the other day because I didn’t know what his true
condition was, but thankfully now he is expected to make a full
recovery following one of the more freakish sports accidents of
all time when he was struck in the neck by a teammate’s skate.
Doctors said Olli Jokinen’s skate narrowly missed cutting
Zednik’s jugular vein, instead severing the carotid artery. The
latter supplies blood to the brain, while jugular vein takes blood
from the brain. “Blood pressure is much higher in the carotid
artery,” as noted in the AP.
According to attending surgeon Sonya Noor of Buffalo General
Hospital, the slashed artery was “hanging by a thread,” but even
though Zednik “lost five pints of blood,” his life was never
considered in jeopardy.
Hell, he only lost five pints?! It looked like five pints spurted out
in the first ten seconds!
Actually, doctors said the cut was “about an inch-and-a-half deep
and also as wide.” Incredibly, with a cut that big, the skate
didn’t hit any other arteries or veins. It’s expected Zednik will
be able to resume normal activities in six to eight weeks. But
just imagine if this had happened in a high school or college
game and the immediate care Zednik received from the Buffalo
staff on ice wasn’t available?
–Following up on my Steve Martin bit the other day, Allen H.
noted that when he was at Bucknell, circa 1972, Martin did a
show there, taking his act into the University Center where he
just sat down at various tables to engage in his routine. You’ve
gotta love it. I was remiss in not mentioning that Martin gave a
stupendous show at Wake Forest in late 1976/early ’77, if I
remember correctly. It was right after he had done “Saturday
Night Live” and was as hot as they come. Every soul on campus
was at that concert, which was as big as anything we had in my
four years there.
–Former PGA Tour golfer Casey Martin (the fellow with the bad
leg, for you casual fans out there) had a few first person thoughts
in the current Golf Digest, of which I give you two.
“On the Hooters and Nationwide tours I’d meet the occasional
veteran player who was pretty jaded about golf. Guys who had
devoted their life to the game but who felt success had eluded
them, unfairly. A couple of them were downright bitter, which
was very hard for me to understand. They might not have
reached all their goals, but how many of us do? They got to
travel, meet extraordinary people, had their health and were not
exactly living hand to mouth. They had options, and they were,
after all, playing a game for a living. I knew that no matter
where you go, you’ll find happy, optimistic people and unhappy
ones. I just thought it was peculiar to find any unhappy person in
golf.”
But get this one from Casey:
“Here’s another reason I’m single: I’m a big believer in Bigfoot.
I’ve probably read as much about them as anybody alive, and,
living here in Oregon where some of them live, I’ve had access
to some first-person stuff from people whose honesty I would
never question. The brother of a close friend of mine saw
Bigfoot while hiking once – a nine-foot ape, walking upright like
a man. We’ll find him within the next 10 years, and when it
happens, I’ll be there.”
Just another reason to be careful when picking up the morning
paper from the driveway.
–On Monday, former pitcher John Rocker told an Atlanta radio
station that “Bud Selig knew in the year 2000 John Rocker was
taking the juice (and) didn’t do anything about it.” Rocker
claimed he flunked a drug test ordered by Major League Baseball
back then and he, Alex Rodriguez and other Texas Rangers were
advised by management and union doctors during spring training
on how effectively to use steroids.
Rocker said doctors took him, A-Rod, Rafael Palmeiro and Ivan
Rodriguez aside and said “Look guys, if you take one kind of
steroid, you don’t triple stack them and take them 10 months out
of the year like Lyle Alzado did. If you do it responsibly, it’s not
going to hurt you.”
–Geezuz, Indiana University basketball coach Kelvin Sampson
is one of the true dirtballs in his sport. Sampson, in his second
year at the school, had been sanctioned by his previous
employer, Oklahoma, for making 577 impermissible phone calls
to recruits. When he then went to Indiana, the Hoosiers put him
on probation in this regard, yet last October IU had to admit he
had made 100 illegal calls despite the probation. So now the
NCAA is investigating Sampson and the school for even more
major infractions. But will the school self-impose sanctions that
eliminate it from post-season consideration, Indiana being No. 13
in the latest AP poll? Or will IU drag the process out until June?
–Kentucky lost to Vanderbilt by 41 points on Tuesday.
–Since I consider myself a junior art expert, let me just say that
the four paintings stolen from the museum in Zurich the other
day were not the best of Cezanne, Degas, van Gogh and Monet.
It’s said the four collectively were worth up to $164 million, but
I’m betting you’ll be able to pick them up at one of those
Holiday Inn / Starving Artists sales for $39.95.
–Boy, I feel old. I saw the other day where Maud Adams of
“Octopussy” fame turned 63.
–I’m all caught up on “The Wire.” Can’t believe I didn’t watch
more than a few episodes of the first four seasons. Great, great
show. And isn’t it amazing that every time you think about
canceling your HBO subscription, there’s something else in the
pipeline to keep you coming back. Over the coming months that
means “John Adams” and the return of “Entourage.”
–Natalie Cole, who presented Amy Winehouse with the Record
of the Year award at the Grammys, said “I think it sends the
wrong message, that even in the midst of her stupor of drugs she
can get nominated for all these awards. It’s a slap in the face to
artists who work very hard that they give it to someone who
really obviously doesn’t have a grasp of what she has.”
Natalie’s father, Nat, echoed his daughter’s sentiments by video
in another rather spooky performance.
Top 3 songs for the week 2/12/72: #1 “Let’s Stay Together” (Al
Green) #2 “American Pie” (Don McLean) #3 “Without You”
(Nilsson)…and…#4 “Precious And Few” (Climax) #5 “Never
Been To Spain” (Three Dog Night) #6 “Hurting Each Other”
(Carpenters…..got-ta STOP!) #7 “Down By The Lazy River”
(The Osmonds) #8 “Joy” (Apollo 100 featuring Tom Parker…
man, can’t place this one) #9 “Brand New Key” (Melanie) #10
“Day After Day” (Badfinger)
NBA Rookies of the Year Quiz Answers: 1) 1971-72, Sidney
Wicks, Port. 2) 1973-74, Ernie DiGregorio, Buff. 3) 1982-83,
Terry Cummings, SD. 4) 1988-89, Mitch Richmond, GS. 5)
1995-96, Damon Stoudamire, Tor.
Next Bar Chat, Monday…President’s Day.
