*It’s a T.O. free Bar Chat! His position in our yearend awards is
secure, anyway.
NFL Quiz…yes, it’s that time of year to get the basics out of the
way before the season starts. So, give me the top ten rushers all-
time. Answer below.
Marcus Williams, Idiot
The other day I mentioned that the UConn point guard, along
with teammate A.J. Price, had been suspended, indefinitely, for
stealing laptop computers. What I didn’t realize at the time is the
extent of their idiotic behavior. Well, here is the account from
USA Today.
“After trying to sell four stolen laptops, Connecticut point guards
Marcus Williams and A.J. Price scrambled to return the
computers to their owners before they were caught, according to
court documents. That effort was unsuccessful and left behind a
pile of evidence….
[A third player, Hilton Armstrong, he of the strange looking
body, tried to help them return the laptops and as of this writing
it doesn’t appear he’s done anything warranting arrest or
suspension from the team.]
“Once the laptops were stolen, Price and Williams made a series
of missteps that led to their arrests…
“First, the three men [including a friend of Williams who does
not attend UConn but physically stole the computers] allegedly
decided to sell (them) and asked a fellow student, Christine
Pettingell, to give them a ride to Manchester and East Hartford
so they could look for pawnshops…
“Their first stop was a bust: The store didn’t buy laptops. It did,
however, have a security camera that recorded the visit. The
store clerk…recognized Williams.
“A second pawnshop offered only $75. Williams allegedly
wanted more money and refused to sell. That left the men
without gas money to pay Pettingell, who told police she ordered
them out of the car.
“When Pettingell got back to campus, her friend, Maxine Davila,
complained that her laptop had been stolen. Pettingell said she
had an idea who took it and went to the police. Davila, a
member of last year’s track and field team, then confronted
Williams and his friend in a dining hall. Police said the friend
began to flee.
“After that, the players began trying to return the computers.
Williams allegedly sought assurance that Davila wouldn’t press
charges, then returned her computer. But it was too late.
University police had obtained search warrants and discovered
two laptops in Price’s room. Price denied knowing they were
there, but police found a series of cellphone text messages
between him and Armstrong that suggested otherwise.”
When confronted with the evidence, Price confessed.
Well, needless to say UConn hoops fans are rather upset.
Williams was going to be a star this season and Price would have
contributed as well. Jeff B., avid supporter, expressed outrage.
“Imagine the stupidity. Every UConn game is on TV in
Connecticut and this dope goes into a pawnshop 10 miles from
campus and doesn’t think anyone will recognize him?! You just
can’t make this stuff up.”
The Beatles Take the Stage
OK, time to wrap up the tale of the first stadium-sized rock
concert in history, the Beatles at Shea, August 15, 1965. As we
pick up our story, that day the Beatles were taken by police
escort from the Warwick Hotel in Manhattan and flown by
helicopter to the World’s Fairgrounds in Queens. From promoter
Sid Bernstein’s book “Not Just the Beatles”:
“The helicopter did a turn around the stadium to let the boys see
the crowd, which was almost filled to capacity by 7:30. When
the helicopter flew over Shea, I knew who the occupants were,
but I’m not sure if the crowd did. The copter landed in the
Fairgrounds and the Wells Fargo armored car brought the Beatles
and Brian (Epstein) into the stadium. They quickly got out of the
car and ran under the stands to the umpires’ dressing room….
“The screaming in the ballpark was unbelievable. I have never
heard noise like that in my life. The place was in a frenzy….
“I went to see the Beatles in the dressing room. They were
absolutely in awe….They were in Shea Stadium in New York,
fifty-five thousand seats, and the place was packed. No
rock’n’roll act had ever played to an audience anywhere close to
that size. We could hear the screaming in the dressing room….
“They were nervous…but this event was so unique and so
different that you would have to have had nerves of pure steel
not to be nervous.
“Five minutes before show time, we proceeded from the dressing
room along a walkway to the visitors’ dugout. When we got to
the entrance of the dugout, I said to the boys, ‘Okay, guys. I’m
going to get up on stage and introduce Ed Sullivan. He will
come up and introduce you. When he does, and I hope you can
hear him, just run up these dugout steps onto the field and up to
the stage….You’ll be surrounded by security, so don’t worry
about safety….
“Murray the K introduced me as the man who had brought the
Beatles to America and I stepped forward to introduce Ed
Sullivan…
“I introduced Ed and said that he was a great American…He then
walked out and, with little fanfare, thanked me for the
introduction and said just five words: ‘Ladies and gentlemen –
the Beatles!’
“The boys ran out of the dugout waving and turning and
surveying the crowd as they ran to the stage. Thousands of
flashbulbs went off. I wondered if the Beatles were in as much
wonderment about the scene in front of them as I was. They got
up on stage, checked their tuning, looked at each other and began
to play ‘Twist & Shout.’ Brian and I stood stage right, right next
to each other.
“ ‘This is quite amazing,’ he practically shouted in my ear. ‘I
hope we can get them out of here.’”
It turns out all Epstein was concerned with was the security.
Bernstein says he mentioned that at least five times during the
32-minute set. Bernstein:
“Some kids tried to jump out of the stands onto the field, but no
one ever came close to being a threat…
“I can’t really say much about the music that night. The
screaming crowd was so overpowering that I doubt anyone heard
the music. I know I didn’t – and I was standing right at the foot
of the stage.
“Ringo’s fans had a custom of tossing jelly beans onto the stage
for him. [And jelly beans rained down from the upper deck but
no one was hurt.] …
“As soon as the Beatles finished playing, the armored car sped
across the field to the stage. I shook hands with the four boys
and Brian. I could see that Brian was relieved. ‘Great, Sid,’ he
said. ‘Just marvelous. Thanks again. I’ll talk to you soon.’”
The Beatles sped off in seconds, out of Shea, and were on their
way to Canada.
“The screaming continued, but the audience soon realized that
there would be no encore. The crowd began to empty out of the
stadium very slowly, as when one departs from a loved one or
object of admiration. I waited until everyone was out of Shea; I
wanted to make sure that no one was injured or harmed in any
way.”
Bernstein made his way to the First Aid station where a staff of
doctors and nurses had been assembled. There were 10 to 15
kids lying on stretchers when he got to the staging area. As Sid
walked in, one of the doctors recognized him. “Hi, Mr.
Bernstein. It was quite a night.” Bernstein:
“All of a sudden, the kids jumped off their stretchers and
besieged me. Once again, the kids wanted to know if I had
shaken the Beatles’ hands.
“ ‘Yes I did,’ I replied.
“ ‘And did you wash your hands yet?’ they asked, almost in
unison.
“ ‘Not since I shook John, Paul, George and Ringo’s hands, no.’
“ ‘Wow! Can we please shake your hand?’ they implored.
“ ‘Sure,’ I said. And they all lined up and one after another
shook my hand….
“The kids all left, vowing never to wash their hands again.”
Stuff
–Congratulations to the Kansas City Royals for finally winning a
game after a near-record 19 straight defeats. I have to admit, I
totally missed this until the streak hit 18. And I must make note
that the Royals were outscored 148-64 during this dreadful
stretch. But in beating the A’s 2-1, it was a Wake Forest alum,
Mike MacDougal, who registered the critical save.
[The longest losing streaks in history are Baltimore’s 21 in 1988
and Philadelphia’s 23 back in 1961.]
–I was reading a piece on the greatest athlete of our generation,
Takeru Kobayashi, and I didn’t realize that back in 2003 for a
Fox television program, Kobayashi lost….yes, lost…to a Kodiak
bear. It seems that the bear ate the target 50 hot dogs in 2
minutes 36 seconds while Kobayashi consumed only 31. It’s not
known if they at least shook hands afterwards in the true spirit of
competition, though my respect for Takeru is undiminished.
[South China Morning Post]
–Speaking of bears, there is a piece in the Sunday New York
Times on the growing problem in dealing with the black bear
population in the Catskill Mountains where up to 1,500 are
wreaking havoc. [5,000 are in the Adirondacks, incidentally,
which is why you won’t see me hiking there probably the rest of
my life.]
But for all my bear talk it needs to be pointed out, in the interest
of fairness, that there has still been just one recorded fatality
from a bear in the history of New York State; the 5-month-old
that was snatched out of his stroller in the Catskills three years
ago. My native New Jersey has never had a fatal attack.
But there’s always a first time, sports fans, and this article by
Lisa W. Foderaro points out one near miss involving Jim and
Mary Anna Cox of Woodstock, New York. [Yes, that
Woodstock.]
“Last summer, a black bear broke through a French door and into
their kitchen several times in a week, even after the door was
boarded up. One night, Mr. Cox, who owns an art gallery, had to
beat the bear back with a fireplace shovel.
“ ‘Remember the scene in ‘The Birds,’ with the birds pecking
through the door?’ he said. ‘Well, this was claws coming
through the door.”
“State environmental officials finally trapped the bear in the
Coxes’ backyard and moved it 40 miles.” It wasn’t killed
because they couldn’t positively I.D. the bruin as the culprit.
“Now, it’s back, apparently. Biologists have followed the bear,
which is wearing a collar with a radio transmitter…to within a
half-mile of the Coxes’ six-acre property.”
Of course if Smokey had just contacted Martha Stewart, he
would have been taught how to slip the dag-burned thing by
now.
–How about those jerks in Kansas who have an animal sanctuary
and allowed a local teenager to pose for her senior photo with a
Siberian tiger? Well, I guess the tiger was camera shy because it
proceeded to clamp its jaws on 17-year-old Haley Hilderbrand,
who later died of her wounds.
But get this, for years her Labette County High School has gone
to the sanctuary to pose for pictures with one of the world’s
greatest killers. What kind of idiot parents would allow this,
regardless of how well-trained the animals are supposed to be?!
–So I happened to catch a travel segment on “Good Morning
America” this Sunday and it was on the Vanuatu island chain.
What a joke…not one mention of all the fatal shark attacks there.
You call that journalism?!
–To the two or three of you who may read the comic strip
“Funky Winkerbean,” I’m sure you agree with me that the
cartoonist is totally out of control. [Two of the main characters
are in Afghanistan and one just escaped a land mine while the
other is involved in a car bomb.]
–I’ve been writing for a month now of how Roger Clemens is
having an historic season, ERA wise. So in Sunday’s Times
there is a piece by David Leonhardt saying that even after
Clemens was hit hard the other day, and with his ERA now up to
1.53, it is still less than a third the league average. Or put
another way, the N.L. average ERA is 2.8 times that of
Clemens’s. That’s never been done before.
The modern record holder is Pedro Martinez’s 1.74 ERA in 2000
when the league was about 2.7 times his mark.
But Leonhardt, a good reporter, goes way too far in calling
Roger’s season “one of the best four or five seasons any pitcher
has ever had.”
The fact is Roger’s won-loss record is still just 11-5. I don’t care
if his ERA ends up being 1.30 by season’s end; if his record is,
say, 16-6, you can’t say it was one of the best! That’s just my
opinion….time for a cold frosty.
–Here’s a baseball tidbit that is falling below the radar.
Minnesota Twins starter Carols Silva has walked just 8 in 166
innings. The fewest for a season, minimum one inning pitched
for each team game, is Bret Saberhagen’s 13 in 177 innings for
the Mets back in 1994. But that’s deceiving. Babe Adams, for
example, allowed only 18 in 263 innings in 1920 for the Pirates,
something I believe I mentioned earlier in the year.
The real way to look at it is fewest walks per 9 innings, season,
and here Adams has the record with 0.62 / 9 inn. Silva is on a
pace to do 0.43. Teammate Brad Radke, incidentally, has
allowed just 19 in 173 innings to date. And for this reason I am
not giving up on my Twinkies to win it all, as I predicted at the
start.
[To complete this topic…the great Christy Mathewson had this
run. 1913…306 IP, 21 walks. 1914…312, 23.]
–We note the passing of San Francisco offensive lineman
Thomas Herrion, 23, who collapsed following a preseason game
in Denver. He had been involved in a touchdown drive as the
game ended and videotape shows him walking off the field,
seemingly OK. Herrion played his college ball at Utah. An
official explanation could be a few weeks in coming.
–When I went to post last time, it wasn’t public that Tiger
Woods left New Jersey before the last holes of the PGA
Championship were played even though he was the leader in the
clubhouse and only two back. Thankfully, CBS commentators
Jim Nantz and Lanny Wadkins blasted Tiger on Sunday’s
coverage of the NEC Invitational for not staying over at
Baltusrol and at least trying to intimidate the guys by
maintaining his presence.
And as Mike Vaccaro of the New York Post wrote:
“If the top of the leader board had finished off its collapse
Monday morning, requiring a playoff, then Tiger would either
have needed one of those particle-beam transporters from Star
Trek to make his tee time or he would have received the most
embarrassing disqualification in the history of golf.”
Oh well…a controversy that basically wasn’t one, in the end.
And Tiger then came back to win the NEC, his 45th career title.
–File this under incredible. The other day when a devastating
tornado hit Stoughton, Wisconsin, storm debris traveled 60 miles
east to the Milwaukee area, where papers, shingles and other
materials were found. But I loved what the chef at the Stoughton
Country Club said after the twister tore the roof off while 40
people huddled in the basement.
“We were hiding behind the bar. We had beer, anyway.”
–According to research presented at the annual meeting of the
American Psychological Association, workaholics “scored
highest in a study of their wives’ or girlfriends’ sexual
satisfaction.” [Times of London]
“The study asked women to measure satisfaction by combining
the physical aspects of…” [censored by the International Web
Site Association….of which StockandNews.com is a member in
good standing. Remember, parents, always look for the IWSA
label when checking up on your child’s web surfing habits.]
–Jerome Williams was your basic journeyman NBA ballplayer
who was cut by the Knicks the other day. Williams chose to
retire, even though he could still contribute in the league at age
32, because the Knicks offered him a front office position. Oh,
and Williams will also receive $18.7 million over the next three
years. Is this a great country or what?!
–I commented in another column on watching Bill Maher’s
HBO show this past Friday night and how awful it was,
particularly the appearance by Ohio Democratic congressional
candidate Major Paul Hackett, who is not only a jerk, but an
arrogant a-hole to boot.
But I also have to comment on comedian Chris Rock. A while
back I wrote of how disappointed I was in his last HBO routine
because heretofore I always thought Rock was one of the funnier
comics around. So on Friday, Rock goes off on all the blacks
dying in Iraq and how it’s the poor man’s war, etc., in a typically
profane way for this once-talented performer who now can’t utter
a single sentence without throwing in three F-bombs.
To Mr. Rock, I don’t know when the last time was that you
actually looked at a group of pictures of those paying the
ultimate price in Iraq, but they are at least 90% white.
Sorry, but in all seriousness I just felt compelled to set the record
straight.
–And now the AP pre-season college football top ten:
1. USC
2. Texas
3. Tennessee
4. Michigan
5. LSU
6. Ohio State
7. Oklahoma
8. Virginia Tech
9. Miami
10. Florida
–The following is for golf junkies. Leading equipment used at
the PGA Championship……source: GolfWeek.
Balls: Titleist 103 (ProV1x 67, ProV1 36), Callaway 18, Nike
17, Srixon 8, Bridgestone 3, Maxfli 3….always liked the feel of a
Maxfli, myself. But then I suck so what do I know?
Drivers: TaylorMade 50, Titleist 40, Callaway 23, Nike 14, Ping
13, Cleveland 10
Irons: Titleist 39, TaylorMade 28, Cleveland 16, Nike 16, Ping
16
Putters: Titleist 59, Odyssey 33, TaylorMade 15, Ping 13
Gloves: FootJoy 50, Titleist 44, Callaway 17, Nike 17
Shoes: FootJoy 94, Adidas 29, Nike 18, Buster Browns 2 …just
seeing if you’re paying attention
–Oakland Raiders receiver and primo dirtball Randy Moss
admits on HBO’s “Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel” that he has
used marijuana throughout his seven-year career in the NFL.
“But as far as abusing it and, you know, letting it take control
over me, I don’t do that, no.” When questioned later back at
training camp, Moss said it was all in the past.
–Jill St. John turned 65 the other day; very depressing for those
of us who grew up admiring her body of work.
Top 3 songs for the week of 8/22/64: #1 “Where Did Our Love
Go” (The Supremes) #2 “Everybody Loves Somebody” (Dean
Martin) #3 “A Hard Day’s Night” (The Beatles)
*So I’m getting back into country music. I go through cycles
with music and every few years I check out the latest talent,
albeit five years after they’ve been discovered by everyone else,
and now I’m a huge Kenny Chesney fan. Hell, it took me two
years to discover “Seinfeld,” after all. [Favorite song…“Outta
Here”]
NFL Quiz Answer: Top ten rushers, career…
1. Emmitt Smith….18,355 yards…3.9 avg.
2. Walter Payton….16,727…4.4
3. Barry Sanders….15,269…5.0
4. Curtis Martin…..13,366…4.1
5. Jerome Bettis…..13,294…3.9
6. Eric Dickerson…13,259…4.4
7. Tony Dorsett……12,739…4.3
8. Jim Brown………12,312…5.2!
9. Marcus Allen……12,243…4.1
10. Franco Harris….12,120…4.1
11. Thurman Thomas…12,074
12. Marshall Faulk…….11,987
We’ll do a story or two this year on Jim Brown. I’ll always
believe he was the best, though I also respect Payton more as the
years go by. Meanwhile, how much higher can Curtis Martin
get? He had his best season last year, at age 31, after all.
Happy Birthday, Taylor!!!!
Next Bar Chat, Thursday.
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