Montreal Expos Quiz: 1) Name the only 3 Expos players to hit
200 or more career home runs in an Expos uniform? 2) Name
the only player to hit 40 homers in a single season? 3) Name the
only two Expos pitchers to win 100 or more games? 4) Name
the only Expos pitcher to win 20 in a season? Answers below.
Les Expos
So about a month ago, I was observing the attendance figures at
Expos games here in Montreal…4,500…4,768…4,200…and I
thought, heck, I need to go there and catch this act. Well, at the
last minute I dragged Johnny Mac along and we took in the
Expos – Red Sox series. Both of us being Mets fans, of course
this made absolutely no sense, but a lot of what I do makes no
real sense.which is what made it all sensible in the first place.
Now with the series starting on Sunday, I figured there might be
a crowd of 15,000 for the first game because of all the Red Sox
fans who would venture up. Try 32,900. 28,000 Red Sox fans
and 4,900 Expos boosters, if that. Unbelievable. J Mac and I
now agree that there are no better fans in the country than Sox
diehards. This city was nothing but Red Sox jerseys and caps the
last few days. [Boston is about a 5-hour drive and there were
also a ton from New Hampshire and Vermont.] The crowd
dwindled to 16,000 for game two and I don”t know what the third
game attendance figure was, but I figure about 12,000. In other
words, it kind of defeated the purpose of why I was coming up
here.I wanted 4,000. I wanted to be able to carry on a
conversation about India / Pakistan with someone across the
field. [Granted, I would have been booted out, but that would
have been part of the story.] Alas, there is little to write about.
Except for the fact that the biggest monstrosity in the world is the
tomb-like Olympic Stadium. [Though some experts say
Minnesota”s Metrodome is just as bad.] Here we are, beautiful
weather in Montreal (we”re talking perfect) and we have to sit
indoors. But that was only part of it.
The sound system is beyond poor, it”s dreadful. The lighting
sucks, the seats were sticky (bring Handi-Wipes), there weren”t
enough vendors and the food selection was awful. Ah, but at
least there was beer, and the Molson Export was tasty.
There were some other good things as well. Canada”s national
anthem is clearly the best in the world and the Metro system
makes getting to the ballpark a piece of cake. Plus the city of
Montreal is clean and friendly, with good food and drink. And
it”s so close to those of us in the Northeast that it”s foolish not to
come up and get swept up in a different world. [Be prepared to
struggle with your high school French.] Lastly, there”s the value
of the dollar, the Canadian dollar. Or, as they call it here, the
“loonie.” Man, the old greenback goes far.
Picasso
With some free time before paying more penance at Olympic
Stadium, the hotel recommended that Johnny Mac and I go see
the “Picasso: Erotique” exhibit. Now I am not a huge fan of
Pablo, but this was one prolific dude.
Born Pablo Ruiz Picasso in Malaga, Spain in 1881, by age 18
Picasso was spending his nights in Spanish brothels and at 19 he
made his first trip to Paris. It was here that he began collecting
women, and they seemed to love to pose for him. So the exhibit
has hundreds and hundreds of drawings and paintings of stuff
that is enough to make one blush…if you”re the blushing sort.
First there was Fernande Olivier (the “buxom” one), followed by
Eva Gouel (“delicate”), Olga Khokhlova, Marie-Therese Walter,
Dora Maar, Francoise Gilot, Jacqueline Roque.and many,
many more.appearing in such titles as “Portrait of the Artist
Making Love,” “Two Women on a Bed,” and “Woman Tickled
by a Fish.” These are about the only ones I feel comfortable
mentioning in this space. Well, then again, there was “Dora and
the Minotaur.” You know what they say, ladies, if you are ever
approached by a minotaur in a bar, firmly say, “No thank you,
my husband is Shaquille O”Neal.” This throws them off
because, while minotaurs are not big sports fans, they are aware
of Shaq.
And so it was that as Johnny Mac and I whipped through this
exhibit, I had to listen in on a guide who said, “We are all sexual
animals, that is why Picasso is so universal.” I still can”t stand
the guy.
Red Bull
Boy, if you like this “energy drink” you may want to think twice.
According to a recent report in the London Times, the popular
Red Bull is under investigation due to reports that three people
have died after consuming it.
The two main ingredients of the product are caffeine and taurine,
which have proved deadly when mixed with alcohol, with most
folks choosing vodka. Sweden”s National Food Administration
has issued a warning that Red Bull should not be mixed with any
alcohol, nor drunk after exercise.
All three victims were healthy. Two died after mixing it with
vodka and the third had several cans after working out. One
woman had just two cans with vodka when she collapsed.
As reporter David Lister notes, however, “For the time being the
possible health risks of the drink are unlikely to take the gloss off
its incredible success. After winning the Wimbledon men”s final
on Monday, there was only one drink that could keep Goran
Ivanisevic and friends celebrating into the night: Red Bull.
Ivanisevic”s jubilant friends bought seven cans of Red Bull and
mixed it with vodka to keep them going.”
A study in Ireland (where an 18-year-old died after consuming
three cans following a basketball game) showed that just two
cans of the drink caused the arteries in the body to dilate and
others to stiffen.
This thus fulfills my public service requirement under the
International Web Site Association. And now for something
completely irresponsible.
Canadian Beer
As J Mac and I settled in for a pleasant lunch at an outdoor cafT
the other day, the menu had about 60 beers from around the
world. The editor was in heaven. But what made this menu
unique was the fact that each brew had its alcohol content listed
right there on the menu. So I decided to start with the strongest
(this is “Bar Chat,” after all…not “Wall Street History”), a
Canadian beer (of course we only drank the local stuff whilst in
Montreal) called Fin du Monde, 9%. Now I have to admit that
there was definitely a kick to it, so much so that I thought it was
probably best to go down to 5.5%. [J Mac stayed with his
Boreale Noire (5.5%), a delightful stout.] So our waitress
recommended that I try Blanche de Chambly, “Its slightly blurry
appearance is characteristic of white-beer recipes dating back to
the Middle Ages.” Truly outstanding. Over the course of the
afternoon we also discussed the current state of the animal
kingdom, and the recent attacks so well documented in this
space. As Johnny concluded, “Hippos are quicker than they”re
given credit for.” “You got that right. Miss, I”ll have another
Blanche de Chambly.”
[And this just in.to Harry K., I finally found Sleeman”s Lager.
Yes, as good as you”ve advertised.]
Stuff
–The Sopranos will be back for a fifth season (I”m not so sure
this is a good idea), but what is upsetting is the rumor that season
#4 won”t be starting until September 2002! Geezuz, what the
heck am I supposed to do with my Sunday nights? After “60
Minutes” and “The Simpsons” I”m stuck. Time to pull out the
CNN “Cold War” videos.
–In another museum here in Montreal I saw a little exhibit on
Canadian Louis Cyr (1863-1912). Now Big Louie was simply
the strongest man in the world.or so legend has it. He once
supported 15 men on his back and raised a 553-lb. weight with a
single finger. Kids, please don”t try this at home.
Top 3 songs for the week of 7/21/73: #1 “Bad, Bad Leroy
Brown” (Jim Croce.just an awful tune) #2 “Yesterday Once
More” (Carpenters) #3 “Shambala” (Three Dog Night)
Golf Note: My man Scott Hoch has now finished in the Top 16
in ten straight PGA Tour events…at age 45.
Expos Quiz Answers: 1) 200 or more career homers: Andre
Dawson, 225; Gary Carter, 220; Tim Wallach, 204. 2) 40 HRs in
a season: Vladimir Guerrero – 44 in 2000, 42 in 1999. 3) 100 or
more wins: Steve Rogers, 158; Dennis Martinez, 100. 4) 20 wins
in a season: Only one, Ross Grimsley with 20 in 1978. Rogers
won 19, 17, and 17. If you got this last one and you can find a
six-pack of Sleeman”s in the U.S., well gosh darn it, you”ve just
made the Bar Chat Hall of Fame.
Next Bar Chat, Friday. We”ll get back on track.and thanks for
being understanding on this one.
